Some people consider sport to be their carrier and role in the society for others it is mostly workout to keep fit .discuss both views and give your own opinion .
One of the rudimentary requirements for human being is exercise ,recently we face with a group of people who does not have expert in phisical education but they refer to vast majority of clubs which are just for bodybuilding . Not only they want to spend time but they also want to stay and keep in a good shape . In this essay, both sides of the argument will be discussed and i will clearly express my point of views.
Those who advocate that sport just as a proffesion , claim that one who is studying phisical education in his university achieved a lot of information during his courses and get his degree then he will expert in our community so he is able to establish a new club and teach his ability to other people who are in his complex.
The supporters of sport can be kind of practice or even play to keep their fit , state that not only should escape from their boring work and mental activity , but they also had better do phisical activities. Most of them want to expend theit leisure time to play exciting games which are burn more calorie such as tennis or ZOMBA because they do not want to be fat.
To sum it up each person should have at least 30 minutes activity each day , in order to have a healthy body . Some recent survey prove that most of the people who have an ordinary sport schedule during their daily life are alive until 90 years, but a group of people who are lazy and obese , do not have enough energy and they are always disappointment so they will bored as soon as possible . As a result each member of our society has a particular duty and they can make money from their carrier.
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|---|---|---|---|
| 2015-04-12 | MahsaEslami | 87 | view |
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people who does not have
people who do not have
Not only they want to spend time but they also want to stay and keep in a good shape
Description: Not only...but also is not used properly. can you re-write this sentence?
sport just as a proffesion
sport is just as a profession
Some recent survey prove that
Some recent surveys prove that
and they are always disappointment
and they are always disappointed
so they will bored as soon as possible .
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to will and bored
Sentence: One of the rudimentary requirements for human being is exercise ,recently we face with a group of people who does not have expert in phisical education but they refer to vast majority of clubs which are just for bodybuilding .
Error: phisical Suggestion: physical
Sentence: Those who advocate that sport just as a proffesion , claim that one who is studying phisical education in his university achieved a lot of information during his courses and get his degree then he will expert in our community so he is able to establish a new club and teach his ability to other people who are in his complex.
Error: proffesion Suggestion: profession
Error: phisical Suggestion: physical
Sentence: The supporters of sport can be kind of practice or even play to keep their fit , state that not only should escape from their boring work and mental activity , but they also had better do phisical activities.
Error: phisical Suggestion: physical
Sentence: Most of them want to expend theit leisure time to play exciting games which are burn more calorie such as tennis or ZOMBA because they do not want to be fat.
Error: theit Suggestion: ?
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Sentences: 9 15
No. of Words: 300 350
No. of Characters: 1287 1500
No. of Different Words: 177 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.162 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.29 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.237 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 69 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 44 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 32 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 15 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 33.333 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 14.142 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.889 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.379 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.662 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.076 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5