Education for young people is important in many countries . However, the others think government should spend more money for education in adult population who can not read and write. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essay topics:

Education for young people is important in many countries . However, the others think government should spend more money for education in adult population who can not read and write. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the global era, education is really important for young people. The important aspect of this issue is young people not only should be defined as a future generation that all of them would replaced old generation in all of part of government or company's positions. however, some countries in the world think that education for adults who have not read and write should be prioritize than education for young people. this issue is whether education for adults is give more positive impacts than education for young people?. In my view, I disagree that education for adults is more important than young people education. I hold this view for some reasons which are set out below.

To begin with, I would like to argue that young people was categorized as the golden generations that the classification of great state in the world were measured by the quality of young people knowledge and skill in that country. Referring to the data from united Nation showed that most of great developing countries worldwide such a united states (US), united Kingdom (UK), Japan, as well as China have many excellent young people as caused they advanced the quality of education for young student to the great level.

On the other hand, some prominent psychologist such as Allan D. Nair and Michael M. Mulle believed that young people are tend to have the strongest effort, the highest commitment, as well as they could attained their goals swiftly than people in another age years old.

however, some scholars believe that education for adults are profitable than education for young people. Unfortunately, there is little evidence to support this views. In contrast, Annual education Survey in 2015 showed that most of education system in the Middle East regions lean to trouble as caused the government just concern to prioritize education for adults.

Taking everything into consideration, I believe that education for young people is more important than education for adults.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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IELTS Writing Task II - IELTS Academic

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 192, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'would' requires the base form of the verb: 'replace'
Suggestion: replace
...uture generation that all of them would replaced old generation in all of part of govern...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 268, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...rt of government or companys positions. however, some countries in the world think that...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 315, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
..., some countries in the world think that education for adults who have not read a...
^^
Line 1, column 376, Rule ID: SHOULD_BE_DO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'prioritized'?
Suggestion: prioritized
...s who have not read and write should be prioritize than education for young people. this i...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 420, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
...ritize than education for young people. this issue is whether education for adults i...
^^^^
Line 5, column 122, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'tended'.
Suggestion: tended
...M. Mulle believed that young people are tend to have the strongest effort, the highe...
^^^^
Line 5, column 203, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: 'attain'
Suggestion: attain
...ghest commitment, as well as they could attained their goals swiftly than people in anot...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...an people in another age years old. however, some scholars believe that education f...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
however, if, really, so, well, in contrast, such as, as well as, in my view, to begin with, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 13.1623246493 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 7.85571142285 64% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 10.4138276553 38% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 13.0 7.30460921844 178% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 24.0651302605 104% => OK
Preposition: 35.0 41.998997996 83% => OK
Nominalization: 23.0 8.3376753507 276% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1654.0 1615.20841683 102% => OK
No of words: 324.0 315.596192385 103% => OK
Chars per words: 5.1049382716 5.12529762239 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.24264068712 4.20363070211 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.58521142109 2.80592935109 92% => OK
Unique words: 163.0 176.041082164 93% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.503086419753 0.561755894193 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 512.1 506.74238477 101% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 5.43587174349 92% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.76152304609 105% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 16.0721442886 93% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.2975951904 103% => OK
Sentence length SD: 73.0258401755 49.4020404114 148% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.266666667 106.682146367 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.6 20.7667163134 104% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.26666666667 7.06120827912 103% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.01903807615 159% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.67935871743 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 3.4128256513 88% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.447927502157 0.244688304435 183% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.174156448745 0.084324248473 207% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.139741257073 0.0667982634062 209% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.252702183312 0.151304729494 167% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.136606287645 0.056905535591 240% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 13.0946893788 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 50.2224549098 100% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.3001002004 102% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.3 12.4159519038 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.24 8.58950901804 96% => OK
difficult_words: 73.0 78.4519038076 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 9.78957915832 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.1190380762 103% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.