Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
The ability to maintain friendships with a small number of people over a long period of time is more important for happiness than the ability to make many new friends easily.
It is critically important to maintain relationship with the friends who is ingenious and helpful. Personally, I believe that continuing a relationship with the old friend is more important in the person's life than making swiftly a new friends. I feel this way because of two reasons which I explore in the following essay.
First of all, having the quality of making friend can help an individual to stay happy. Nowadays, people need to change their location for better job, education, etc. If we make a new friends instantly at that moment, it gives us good engagement in the strange place without feeling loner and isolated. My personal experience is the compelling example of this. Few years ago, when I was employed in the food factory as a sales representatives, I had to travel frequently a different places and meeting a different people of different perspectives. However, I utilized this challenge as the opportunity and quickly fused with the people interest. That attitude helped a lot to get company in the peculiar atmosphere. Had I never been so interactive with the person, I would end up staying in the hotel room feeling bored.
Apart from getting good company in th novel environment, this skills may assist you to meet the important people who can help in your career. Unless, getting more interaction, there will be less chance of getting exposure for your career. For example; during my work time in food industry, I was unhappy because of my salary. Despite I had been employed for five years, I still stucked in the same salary range. While during one meeting in the mumbai, I was accidently meet the regional chairmen of the liquor. After our conversation, he realized that I was unsatisfied with my job and offered me position in his company with handsome salary.
In conclusion, I strongly believe that being a cosmopolitan in nature and interactive is advantagous for the person. This is because person can get easily new opportunity and need not to feel left even in new environment.
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2023-06-03 | sonyeoso | 80 | view |
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- TOEFL T P O 4 - Integrated Writing Task 3
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 198, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
...the old friend is more important in the persons life than making swiftly a new friends....
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 237, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'friend'?
Suggestion: friend
... persons life than making swiftly a new friends. I feel this way because of two reasons...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 185, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'friend'?
Suggestion: friend
...r job, education, etc. If we make a new friends instantly at that moment, it gives us g...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 428, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'representative'?
Suggestion: representative
...employed in the food factory as a sales representatives, I had to travel frequently a different...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 723, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[5]
Message: The adverb 'never' is usually put after the verb 'been'.
Suggestion: been never
...mpany in the peculiar atmosphere. Had I never been so interactive with the person, I would...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 644, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...on in his company with handsome salary. In conclusion, I strongly believe that b...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 185, Rule ID: NEEDNT_TO_DO_AND_DONT_NEED_DO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'feel'?
Suggestion: feel
...get easily new opportunity and need not to feel left even in new environment.
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, however, if, may, so, still, while, apart from, for example, i feel, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 40.0 43.0788530466 93% => OK
Preposition: 44.0 52.1666666667 84% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1681.0 1977.66487455 85% => OK
No of words: 341.0 407.700716846 84% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.92961876833 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.29722995808 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.87888430119 2.67179642975 108% => OK
Unique words: 197.0 212.727598566 93% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.577712609971 0.524837075471 110% => OK
syllable_count: 531.9 618.680645161 86% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 30.3845163951 48.9658058833 62% => OK
Chars per sentence: 88.4736842105 100.406767564 88% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.9473684211 20.6045352989 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.42105263158 5.45110844103 99% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.204753853075 0.236089414692 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0593047491339 0.076458572812 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0541708730004 0.0737576698707 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.130641100385 0.150856017488 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0611498433907 0.0645574589148 95% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.8 11.7677419355 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 58.1214874552 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.02 10.9000537634 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.42 8.01818996416 105% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 86.8835125448 98% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.