Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Movies and television have more negative effects than positive effects on the way young people behave. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
In today's progressive world we live in, no one can cast a shadow of doubt on the fact that television play a prominent role in people's lives. It shows different programs such movies, advertisement and so forth which each of them could affect on our behavior. Moreover, people usually spend much time on watching TV. Meanwhile, there is an intriguing debate amongst different groups of people whether movies and television have negative impact on children's behavior on not? Some people hold the conviction that TV has mostly positive effect on children's behavior because they show instructive programs and cartoons which could bring about many advantages for children. Besides, it would keep them inside home and provide a suitable atmosphere for parents to supervise their kids. Contrary to this group, others take an entirely different viewpoint, averring that movies and TV's disadvantages outweigh its benefits. As far as I am concerned, I firmly agree with the latter ones. In what follows, there will be several important reasons raised, in order to shed light on the standpoint, I am taking here.
The first and foremost reason which comes to mind to substantiate my vantage point is that it could cause some antisocial behavior in kids. Usually, movies and TV programs have violence and vulgar language in themselves and children due to their ages have a habit to imitate the things they saw. As a result it could cause them to learn the vulgar languages or show violence in school or with their friends. Recently, an empirical study has been conducted in my country, Iran, to show the effect of movies on children. In the study, some primary school students were asked to watch a movie. There was some bad world in the movie which students have not heard those before in their lives. The results of this survey have shown that 50 percent of them used those words after watching movie. This puts more evidence behind the fact that TV and movies could have detrimental impact on children.
Another significant reason which should be taken into consideration is that TV and movies could change the living style. Today the life of most children are stationary, that is to say that they use to sit on the couch and watch TV instead of running around the home and other similar activities which a kid must do to develop his or her mind and body in decent way. In addition, this could have very bad effect on their health, since just sitting on a place could cause several diseases such as obesity and diabetic. This will be more bold when we know that the constantly the number of children who are addict to TV is increasing. Actually, one study in Middle-East which has done by scientist has shown that today more than 75 percent of children between 7 to 12 years of age are spending more than three hours per day on the TV.
In a nutshell, on the basis of the points mentioned above, it is rational to draw a conclusion that movies and television could have more negative effect on children's behavior; because it could make some antisocial behavior in them such as violence. Furthermore, it could have bad impact on their health since it could change their living style from an active style to a passive one. It is a matter of time one finds above discussion convincing enough to reach a common understanding of the issue which has just been expressed
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 237, Rule ID: AFFECT_EFFECT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'effect'?
Suggestion: effect
...t and so forth which each of them could affect on our behavior. Moreover, people usually ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 46, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'mind substantiating'.
Suggestion: mind substantiating
...irst and foremost reason which comes to mind to substantiate my vantage point is that it could cause...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 194, Rule ID: USE_TO_VERB[1]
Message: Did you mean 'used'?
Suggestion: used
...re stationary, that is to say that they use to sit on the couch and watch TV instea...
^^^
Line 3, column 558, Rule ID: THE_EXACTLY_THE[1]
Message: Duplicated 'the' in the phrase: 'the constantly the'. Did you mean 'constantly the'?
Suggestion: constantly the
...his will be more bold when we know that the constantly the number of children who are addict to TV...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 596, Rule ID: WHO_NOUN[1]
Message: A noun should not follow "who". Try changing to a verb or maybe to 'who is a are'.
Suggestion: who is a are
...t the constantly the number of children who are addict to TV is increasing. Actually, o...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, besides, first, furthermore, if, moreover, so, while, in addition, such as, as a result, that is to say
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 9.8082437276 184% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 13.8261648746 137% => OK
Relative clauses : 22.0 11.0286738351 199% => OK
Pronoun: 55.0 43.0788530466 128% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 81.0 52.1666666667 155% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2781.0 1977.66487455 141% => OK
No of words: 581.0 407.700716846 143% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.78657487091 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.90957651803 4.48103885553 110% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.53005842536 2.67179642975 95% => OK
Unique words: 295.0 212.727598566 139% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.507745266781 0.524837075471 97% => OK
syllable_count: 849.6 618.680645161 137% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6003584229 121% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.3606756709 48.9658058833 97% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.24 100.406767564 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.24 20.6045352989 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.52 5.45110844103 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 11.8709677419 51% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 12.0 4.88709677419 246% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.173358282158 0.236089414692 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0494225425379 0.076458572812 65% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0368608486656 0.0737576698707 50% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.113062428726 0.150856017488 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0131639129098 0.0645574589148 20% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.8 11.7677419355 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.8 10.9000537634 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.98 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 118.0 86.8835125448 136% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.