Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Playing computer games is a waste of time. Children should not be allowed to play them.

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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Playing computer games is a waste of time. Children should not be allowed to play them.

Have you ever thought about a world without computer games? Do you really think that playing these games have any benefit for children?

I wholeheartedly believe that playing computer games are really harmful for children and is a waste of time. There are many reasons that substantiate my opinion and I will explore the few of the most important ones here. First and foremost, playing video games may addict children; furthermore, they may cause some problems in children's development. Lastly, playing these games will not allow children to benefit from useful activities like reading books and etc.

Underestimating the significance of bad habits on children's behavior is not logical. Have people realized the impact of addiction to these games on child development, they would have focused on this issue much more meticulously. It is axiomatic that spending too much time on playing games will lead to an addiction to these games and it is crystal clear that addiction to any activity will increase the bad behaviors on children, like aggressive and antisocial behaviors. The data yielded by a recent study in Tabriz university provides convincing evidence that children who are spending more than two hours a day on these games are showing aggressive behavior to their friends and even their own toys.

Having discussed the issue from that point of view, I would rather discuss it from another perspective. No one can deny that technology has a very bad effect on children, specially their development. The researches showed that activities like watching television and playing computer games or using smart phones are really harmful for children. These activities can disturb brain development and cause problems on moral and emotional develop. Dr Pour Sharifi, my psychology professor in addition a highly educated person stated that in last decade developmental disease in children has increased due to explosion of technology use furthermore, learning disabilities in school known as LD is a worldwide phenomenon and it is increasing with spending more time on playing video and computer games.

Apart from what I have mentioned above, another factor that should be taken into consideration is neglecting from useful activities. These days children are too busy with technology and games that they are reluctant on reading books or learning important skills. As we know, reading book for mind, is like doing sport for body and children should do such activities in order to have powerful mind. A prime example of my own story may shed some light on this issue. Last year, I was working with five year old children in a Montessori kindergarten. There were plenty of useful things for children like special tools for math learning but, some children was so addicted to playing games that they did not enjoy such a great tools and activities.

Putting all above mentioned factors into consideration, the following conclusion can be drawn about the topic. Playing computer games is a real waste of time specially for children for few reasons. First, they may get addicted to these games and they will absolutely face some developmental and learning disabilities. Finally, reading books and useful activities may loose their interest for children. That is why I believe that we should not let children to play too much of games.

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playing these games have any benefit for children?
playing these games has any benefit for children?

playing computer games are really harmful
playing computer games is really harmful

Sentence: These activities can disturb brain development and cause problems on moral and emotional develop.
Description: An adjective is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to emotional and develop

flaws:
Don't need to list reasons in the introduction and conclusion both. This will create duplicated content.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 25 in 30
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 541 350
No. of Characters: 2745 1500
No. of Different Words: 255 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.823 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.074 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.702 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 186 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 155 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 111 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 65 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.808 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.224 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.423 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.318 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.515 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.084 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5