Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? For success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Success has been an issue broadly discussed and defined as different achievements depending the attitude and opinion; so, what we need to be successful in our job? Everyone will answer this question based on his/her own characters, emotional concerns or personal experience. Since a logical response requires an accurate analyses from both sides, I claim that ability to build a good relationship with people is more important; therefore, I present the following justifications.
The first and the most significant reason that we must consider is that we can attract more customers by having perfect relation with them, while even critics can't raise question on this point. Costumers are the main source of the companies' profit and it is obvious that more costumers will bring more economic earning. By having an experience advertiser who knows how to be related well to the people and build a relationship, a company will obtain sufficient money and companies have tendency to hire these type of advertisers. Thus, an individual has more chance to get a perfect job in these companies if he has the ability of relating to the people.
Another noteworthy aspect that should be addressed in this ongoing explanation is that we need to be related with our co-workers. Due to spending the most of our time with our co-workers, it is essential to be able to build closer relationship with them, and underestimating the importance of this comment will lead to suffering all time when we work. Moreover, managers and bosses have their own type of behaviors and if a new employee can't communicate with them in a good way, he can't endure the awful situation of his job, but he can create an appealing environment for himself by having higher social skills.
Admittedly, in some circumstances we need a basic knowledge which we studied during schools, and we shouldn't be unaware of this point. Every employee needs these knowledge in order to apply them in his works. However, I believe that many of the courses and subjects which we study in our schools isn't relevant to our current job. So, there is no need to study hard during the school and anyone can learn these skills and knowledge just one month before getting the job.
To sum up, I don't deny that studying the basic principals in schools are necessary, but taking all the considerations and factors into account and careful analyzing all aspects, I assert that social abilities and relating well to the people are more useful to succeed in the future job.
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many of the courses and subjects which we study in our schools isn't relevant to our current job
many of the courses and subjects which we study in our schools aren't relevant to our current job
flaws:
it is off the topic. Read topic carefully:
it is 'studying hard in school'. It is not 'studying the basic principals in schools'
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 21 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 428 350
No. of Characters: 2049 1500
No. of Different Words: 228 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.548 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.787 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.723 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 148 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 112 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 75 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 51 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.533 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.151 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.333 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.595 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.17 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5