Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Educating children is a more difficult task today than it was in the past because they spend so much time on cell phone, online games, and social networking Web site.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Without the shadow of doubt, technological advances have altered the way we live and have such a great impact on our lives that can not be over looked. Some may consider that online connections and cell phones have negative affect on the students education but as far as I am concerned they can also be of great advantage too. So I am completely disagree with that statement.
Firs and foremost, maybe some students use them only for entertainment but cell phones and social networks are reasons that some students do self study. Self study can help students that do not want to waste their time by going to classes like me. I will assert my point with an example. I study in Iran for master degree in sciens but whenever I attend a class professors starts to describe their own experiences instead of just teaching, So at least three quarter of the class time along with my time wastes on subjects that are irrelevant so I decided to study by myself and joined a social online group. In this group we are able to ask our questions and some one who knows the answer just submit a comment in response to the question so as a result of this I am able to spend at least eight hours of the day to study and if I had any question I just submit it online.
The last but not the least reason that one should take into account this significant is distant learning. Although cell phones and mobile phones can occupy students mind, it can offer distant learning. Distant learning not only helps student to save time and money but also it provides a platform to connect to individuals outside the country too. There are mobile applications and social networks that lets you watch famous professors teaching advance classes in high ranked universities. An instance can illustrate my point better. I study optimization and there are some courses that I can not attend because no professor in Iran is educated enough to teach the course but such courses in MIT, the best university in the world, are normal. So by searching online I have found that a mobile application called edX offers these classes for free, consequently I just downloaded the application on my mobile phone and now I am learning convex optimization by watching only videos. Also the professors who are casting these videos are the ones that I dream to meet.
To wrap it up, all aforementioned reasons and examples shows that while students can only play with their tools, those who like to study can implement them the proper way and learn more buy using online classes and saving time. So I think what most of the people allude to as obstacle to student education, has more advantages for the education.
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- TPO 22 Integrated Writing Task 42
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 140, Rule ID: OVER_LOOKED[1]
Message: Did you mean 'overlooked'?
Suggestion: overlooked
...eat impact on our lives that can not be over looked. Some may consider that online connecti...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 162, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'considers'.
Suggestion: considers
...s that can not be over looked. Some may consider that online connections and cell phones...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 225, Rule ID: AFFECT_EFFECT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'effect'?
Suggestion: effect
...nnections and cell phones have negative affect on the students education but as far as I ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 239, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'students'' or 'student's'?
Suggestion: students'; student's
...cell phones have negative affect on the students education but as far as I am concerned ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 347, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'disagreed'.
Suggestion: disagreed
...great advantage too. So I am completely disagree with that statement. Firs and fore...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 660, Rule ID: ANY_BODY[1]
Message: Did you mean 'someone'?
Suggestion: someone
...up we are able to ask our questions and some one who knows the answer just submit a comm...
^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 981, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...x optimization by watching only videos. Also the professors who are casting these vi...
^^^^
Line 13, column 187, Rule ID: BUY_VBG[1]
Message: Did you mean 'by'?
Suggestion: by
...ment them the proper way and learn more buy using online classes and saving time. S...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, if, look, may, so, while, at least, i think, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 13.8261648746 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 55.0 43.0788530466 128% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 53.0 52.1666666667 102% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 8.0752688172 186% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2204.0 1977.66487455 111% => OK
No of words: 473.0 407.700716846 116% => OK
Chars per words: 4.65961945032 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.66353547975 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.53402221544 2.67179642975 95% => OK
Unique words: 238.0 212.727598566 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.503171247357 0.524837075471 96% => OK
syllable_count: 697.5 618.680645161 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 9.59856630824 52% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 20.1344086022 129% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 76.9839850269 48.9658058833 157% => OK
Chars per sentence: 122.444444444 100.406767564 122% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.2777777778 20.6045352989 128% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.5 5.45110844103 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.5376344086 144% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.172714125353 0.236089414692 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0567344247611 0.076458572812 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0462015799704 0.0737576698707 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.107502347341 0.150856017488 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0135756803861 0.0645574589148 21% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.7 11.7677419355 116% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.55 58.1214874552 92% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.1575268817 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.04 10.9000537634 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.0 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 92.0 86.8835125448 106% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.0537634409 123% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.