do you agree or disagree with the following statements people today spend too much time on personal enjoyment doing things they like to do rather than doing things they should do Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

Essay topics:

do you agree or disagree with the following statements?
people today spend too much time on personal enjoyment - doing things they like to do rather than doing things they should do.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Life is a one time opportunity. Currently, people like to enjoy their life as much as they can. It is not true that people do not give importance to their other duties on behalf of enjoyment. I believe both enjoyment and work are crucial to lead a happy life.
A Human inquisitive mind is insatiable and people always like to experience different things in their life. A soaring improvement in science and technology has endowed humans with far more facilities than in the past. For example, the improvement in the aircraft has made travel quicker. To avail such an opportunity now people like to travel all over the world. People are traveling more often to enjoy different cities and exotic cultures. Moreover, there are more options available in the cities for enjoyment. For instance games, party Cruzes, bars, city sighting, restaurants, etc are at every corner of the street. At weekends such amusement places are crowded with people. Therefore people are spending their precious time and money on their enjoyment.
However, in this competitive era, people are working hard to earn money. As every amusement activity is associate with some charges. Consequently, even to enjoy life one has to go to work to earn money. So it is not realistic to say people neglect their duties over their enjoyment. Most people are involved in full-time jobs and only during vocations, they go sightseeing. Hence. people are spending their major chunk of time at work.
To conclude, a modern generation knows the value of time and money. People are wise enough to strike an equal balance between enjoyment and their obligations.

Votes
Average: 6 (1 vote)
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Independent TOEFL Writing

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 680, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
...usement places are crowded with people. Therefore people are spending their precious time...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 73, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... people are working hard to earn money. As every amusement activity is associate w...
^^
Line 3, column 374, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
... during vocations, they go sightseeing. Hence. people are spending their major chunk ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 381, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: People
... vocations, they go sightseeing. Hence. people are spending their major chunk of time ...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, hence, however, if, moreover, so, therefore, as to, for example, for instance

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 9.8082437276 10% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 1.0 11.0286738351 9% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 16.0 43.0788530466 37% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 52.1666666667 79% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 8.0752688172 198% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1351.0 1977.66487455 68% => OK
No of words: 270.0 407.700716846 66% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.0037037037 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.05360046442 4.48103885553 90% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.66868493582 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 151.0 212.727598566 71% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.559259259259 0.524837075471 107% => OK
syllable_count: 440.1 618.680645161 71% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 9.59856630824 31% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 12.0 20.1344086022 60% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 18.6664237108 48.9658058833 38% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 64.3333333333 100.406767564 64% => OK
Words per sentence: 12.8571428571 20.6045352989 62% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.33333333333 5.45110844103 79% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 19.0 11.8709677419 160% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.164080024015 0.236089414692 69% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.047612678248 0.076458572812 62% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0428967060583 0.0737576698707 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.100917390417 0.150856017488 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0493730180715 0.0645574589148 76% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.6 11.7677419355 73% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.3 58.1214874552 102% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.0 10.1575268817 79% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.83 10.9000537634 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.97 8.01818996416 99% => OK
difficult_words: 64.0 86.8835125448 74% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 10.002688172 60% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 6.8 10.0537634409 68% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.