If you could change one important thing about your hometown, what would you change?

Essay topics:

If you could change one important thing about your hometown, what would you change?

If you could change one important thing about your hometown, what would you change?

Life in Bangalore is fast paced, here time is as valuable as money. Bangalore is booming because of the software industry. This has caused a large influx of skilled immigrants into the city. Bangalore was never designed to harbor such a large population, and due to this influx, life in Bangalore has become difficult due to a single menace, traffic. Traffic jams in Bangalore can last for hours, in some places it can take 4 hours to cover just 5 kilometers.
I would advocate that we should redesign the current transport network and improve it, this would solve many issues and could also bring about economic development.

Firstly, since the immigrants who move to Bangalore are skilled and work for high paying IT companies, they are able to afford private vehicles easily. This rapid growth in vehicular population has strained this cities infrastructure. Most software companies have their campuses at the outskirts of the city. If we develop a fast moving uninterrupted highway we can ease the strain off the current roads that were never designed for such a large population. This would make it easier to move goods and services within the city and it will ease the strain of travel for the software workers as well.

The second point I would make is that a lot of time is wasted in these traffic jams. Hours at a time are lost in simply waiting for the light to turn green. This may seem like a small issue, but when we take the entire population as a whole we can see that the economic loss is very high. I believe that if we fix this traffic issue we will be able to bring about an economic change as many workers will be able to put more time on work rather than waiting in a car. These changes will also improve the standard of living for many people as right now due to the loss of time people simply go to work and come back home. The traffic leaves little time for other lifestyle activities.

Finally, I would say that it is known that an infrastructure overhaul would mean billions of dollars being spent, but this would bring about both and economic and lifestyle change that would pay off in the long run.

Votes
Average: 8.8 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 213, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'cities'' or 'city's'?
Suggestion: cities'; city's
... vehicular population has strained this cities infrastructure. Most software companies...
^^^^^^

Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'finally', 'first', 'firstly', 'if', 'may', 'second', 'so', 'well']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.217798594848 0.229887763892 95% => OK
Verbs: 0.15925058548 0.158761421928 100% => OK
Adjectives: 0.103044496487 0.0866891130778 119% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0468384074941 0.046263068375 101% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0491803278689 0.0685040099705 72% => OK
Prepositions: 0.114754098361 0.118717715034 97% => OK
Participles: 0.0351288056206 0.0351676179071 100% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.39890350722 2.67179642975 90% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0281030444965 0.0309702414327 91% => OK
Particles: 0.00702576112412 0.00188951952338 372% => OK
Determiners: 0.103044496487 0.0887237588012 116% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0491803278689 0.0209618222197 235% => Less modal verbs wanted (like 'must , shall , will , should , would , can , could , may , and might').
WH_determiners: 0.0117096018735 0.0139019557991 84% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2223.0 2387.08602151 93% => OK
No of words: 396.0 408.028673835 97% => OK
Chars per words: 5.61363636364 5.86048508987 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46091344257 4.48200974243 100% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.292929292929 0.338922669872 86% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.19696969697 0.251872472559 78% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.128787878788 0.174417080927 74% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.0732323232323 0.112833075102 65% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.39890350722 2.67179642975 90% => OK
Unique words: 203.0 212.727598566 95% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.512626262626 0.524397521467 98% => OK
Word variations: 56.4800952836 59.2087087015 95% => OK
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6684587814 92% => OK
Sentence length: 20.8421052632 20.5533526081 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.5548257494 48.84282405 95% => OK
Chars per sentence: 117.0 120.699889404 97% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.8421052632 20.5533526081 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.526315789474 0.644075263715 82% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 4.5376344086 132% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.54480286738 18% => OK
Readability: 40.5390749601 45.7405998639 89% => OK
Elegance: 1.44036697248 1.45489161554 99% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.147876113212 0.300154397459 49% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.0943742220827 0.103427244359 91% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.067827145652 0.0752933317313 90% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.544870593887 0.497263757937 110% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.222825939125 0.151897553556 147% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0726610313419 0.114077575197 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.221788629244 0.0781384742642 284% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.175997463082 0.336927656856 52% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.134379791221 0.067059652881 200% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.214224744143 0.210909579961 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.354338934094 0.0618886996521 573% => Less connections among paragraphs

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8870967742 59% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.86379928315 155% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.91756272401 122% => OK
Positive topic words: 6.0 8.42114695341 71% => OK
Negative topic words: 5.0 2.4623655914 203% => OK
Neutral topic words: 3.0 2.75985663082 109% => OK
Total topic words: 14.0 13.6433691756 103% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

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Rates: 88.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 26.5 Out of 30
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.