Nowadays, it is commonly accepted that incredible children's inclination to play computer games or spend time on Internet websites is a very serious problem in most societies. Unfortunately, the responsible organization attempts to reduce this misuse of the electronic device have not been successful until now. Contrary to this popular belief there are still those who disagree with this fact and argue that some people exaggerate the problem. However, I, to a great extent agree with this idea that today's children rely too much on the technology, like computers, smartphones video games for fun and entertainment than playing simpler toys or playing outside with their friends would be better for the children's development.
First and foremost, today because of modern lifestyle and living in apartments the possibility of physical activities for children decreased significantly. In the apartments there is not enough space for traditional plays with high physical movements, therefore children have not other choices for entertainment other than computer games. For example, when I was a child me and my friends spent most of our time to play outside of the home and it was highly fun. But, today, playing children in the upstairs hose in my apartment disappointed me because of noises.
Another significant fact that should be taken into consideration is that today often both parents are working outside of the house, so children after school are alone at home. Because there is not anyone to take them to park or sport place they should busy themselves with Internet websites and video games instead of spending time with other children, it can have really concerning consequences that could observe in most societies, fat children and reducing the age for diseases like diabetes and cancer. Furthermore, a lack in social interaction is a threatened for mental healthy like depression and stress in children.
On the basis of reasons that was mentioned above, I am convinced that today children are too much rely on technological entertainment than traditional plays and fun. Because of the change in houses style and available space for playing children and because parents do not allocate enough time for their children.
- TPO44-Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Other believe that it is best to use that time doing things together that are relate 80
- TPO 39 integrated essay 3
- It is more important to keep your old friends than to make new friends. 86
- TPO 45- In the past, young people depended too much on their parents to make decisions for them; today young people are better able to make decisions about their own lives 73
- Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 73
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, furthermore, however, if, really, so, still, therefore, for example, to a great extent
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 28.0 43.0788530466 65% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1883.0 1977.66487455 95% => OK
No of words: 356.0 407.700716846 87% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.2893258427 4.8611393121 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34372677135 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.86186607428 2.67179642975 107% => OK
Unique words: 197.0 212.727598566 93% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.553370786517 0.524837075471 105% => OK
syllable_count: 585.9 618.680645161 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 9.59856630824 31% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 20.6003584229 63% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 27.0 20.1344086022 134% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 63.0169508519 48.9658058833 129% => OK
Chars per sentence: 144.846153846 100.406767564 144% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.3846153846 20.6045352989 133% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.53846153846 5.45110844103 138% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 11.8709677419 42% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.472346289874 0.236089414692 200% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.162203864543 0.076458572812 212% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.148532552845 0.0737576698707 201% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.28907220232 0.150856017488 192% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0775773428511 0.0645574589148 120% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.2 11.7677419355 146% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.07 58.1214874552 76% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 10.1575268817 136% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.7 10.9000537634 126% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.06 8.01818996416 113% => OK
difficult_words: 92.0 86.8835125448 106% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 10.002688172 150% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 10.0537634409 127% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.247311828 137% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.