Nowadays, many a parent ferries their children to extra classes when they are supposed to play football or volunteer in local communities, an attempt to improve children’s position in the queue for the best universities, and hence the best jobs. In their opinion, academic training deserves more attention than extracurricular activities. I disagree. I believe the latter plays a bigger role in students’ growth than the former.
Admittedly, academic study is vital for students/serves students well. It is the only when a high school student performs well in exams can they have the chance to further his academic pursuit in college. Similarly, big companies are less likely to recruit graduates who fail most of their major courses. However, it is an exaggeration to state that academic pursuit is the highest priority for students while extracurricular activities is secondary. It is never too late for people to pick up books and back to campus to continue their academic pursuit because they can attend college entrance examinations at any time they want, but if students are deprived of chances to engage in extracurricular activities such as Students Government, or drama club, they will lose something hard to be gained afterward.
First, extracurricular activities help to build skillsets essential for students’ future success. By running for president of the student government, a student learns to invent a catchy slogan and launch an aggressive campaign to win students’ votes, during which the student hones his communication skills and leadership. In order to win a football championship, a student may have to give up a good shooting opportunity to members who stand a bigger chance in an important match. At that moment, he can have a deeper understanding of cooperation. These valuable experiences and skills, which cannot be easily acquired by academic study because students often study alone to accomplish various assignments, hold the key to their success in future jobs, no matter they work as a programmer in a high-tech company or a lawyer fighting for social justice. It is because they all end up working with others. If they get cold feet in express themselves and find it hard to fit in with colleagues then, they may be left behind.
Second, by participating in those activities, students can expand their circle of friends. No matter participating in a football team, taking internships, or working in a student government, students are not alone. They can branch out and meet students from different grades, majors and backgrounds. Besides, the shared similar interests or passions with like-minded peers help friendships form effortlessly. For example, my best friend Jack was the football captain of my high school. When others taunted us about our dream to win the state championship, he always stepped in and boosted morale by giving us a pep talk. Therefore, whenever I bump into an obstacle, he is the one I can confide in. Clearly, if I only focused on academic study, I would have lost what a wonderful friend.
In a nutshell, participating in various activities is of greater importance than academic study.
- Participating in organizations and clubs is as important as academic studies for students 80
- TOEFL T P O 42 Integrated Writing Task 3
- Which do you prefer with the same rate of pay an interesting and challenging job with less vacation or a job with more vacation time but less fun 73
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement Young people should try several different jobs before they take a long term career 78
- Do you agree or disagree It is easier for parents to raise children than it was 50 years ago 73
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...something hard to be gained afterward. First, extracurricular activities help t...
^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...leagues then, they may be left behind. Second, by participating in those activi...
^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...uld have lost what a wonderful friend. In a nutshell, participating in various ...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, but, first, hence, however, if, may, second, similarly, so, then, therefore, well, while, for example, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 42.0 43.0788530466 97% => OK
Preposition: 68.0 52.1666666667 130% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2665.0 1977.66487455 135% => OK
No of words: 510.0 407.700716846 125% => OK
Chars per words: 5.22549019608 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.75217629947 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.08062928906 2.67179642975 115% => OK
Unique words: 287.0 212.727598566 135% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.562745098039 0.524837075471 107% => OK
syllable_count: 811.8 618.680645161 131% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 78.113414981 48.9658058833 160% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.041666667 100.406767564 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.25 20.6045352989 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.95833333333 5.45110844103 91% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.333005647368 0.236089414692 141% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0870853867307 0.076458572812 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0901287038118 0.0737576698707 122% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.187968587982 0.150856017488 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0659049008484 0.0645574589148 102% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.8 11.7677419355 117% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 58.1214874552 86% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.05 10.9000537634 120% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.64 8.01818996416 108% => OK
difficult_words: 128.0 86.8835125448 147% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 10.002688172 120% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 80.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.