People have different ways of escaping the stress and difficulties of modern life. Some read; some exercise; others work in their gardens. What do you think are the best ways of reducing stress? Use specific details and examples in your answer.
Escaping the stress and difficulties of modern life is very important for our health. Now it is more crucial than before to reduce our stress to enjoy life and be successful. I prefer photography because it makes me fresh and happy. When I am surrounded with a lot of works and exams, I go somewhere to take pictures and relax. Although some people may think photography is just wasting money and time, I believe that nothing like photography can increase your concentration. Actually photography has improved my life in three main ways.
First of all, photography can increase your concentration. When you focus on the subject of photo, you cannot think about your problems and hardship. For example, every weekend I go to Lake Swan to see natural scenes and take picture of birds and lake in sunset and sunrise. It is accepted that nature can reduce the stress and help you heighten your energy. So, every Monday I return to work more joyful than other colleagues. This experience taught me that photography is the best way to recede stressful life and counteract its effects.
Moreover, photography records our best memories. All of us have a lot of exciting memories that we do not want to forget them and if we have their photos, we feel those rapturous emotions again. For instance, my husband surprised me in our sixth anniversary and invited our families and friends to celebrate this fantastic day together. Every time I see its pictures, I feel great, even if I be depressed. As you can see, photography save our awesome memories to review them later so can decrease our stress.
Furthermore, despite it is weird, people can lose weight with photography. A photographer has to run and stand for the entire day to capture a unique object. For example, since I started photography I could lose more than 12 pounds because I could not eat even the whole day. I did not use to intense activities but after learning photography I could strengthen my muscles and body. Therefore, photography motivates us to participate in outdoor activities and makes us fresh and happy.
In conclusion, not also do photography increase our concentration to escape stress but also protect our special memories and days to review them again. On the other hand, it help us to take part in outdoor activities and lose weight and feel healthy. I recommend people to try photography when they are sad. The result is amazing.
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despite it is weird,
Description: check books how to use 'despite'
not also do photography increase our concentration to escape stress but also protect our special memories
not only do photography increase our concentration to escape stress but also it protects our special memories
flaws:
More compound or complex sentences/clauses wanted. Don't always use 'I' as the subject of a sentence.
'On the other hand' means 'However'. It doesn't mean 'On another hand'.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 23 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 413 350
No. of Characters: 1947 1500
No. of Different Words: 218 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.508 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.714 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.704 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 134 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 98 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 68 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.885 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.892 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.615 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.302 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.471 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.119 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5