Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Nowadays, as it commonly sensed, since getting high scores is a point on which a student shows his or her academic success, parents are restricted in their children's grades extremely regarding to the fact that parents believe their offspring could not make their fortune, unless they study hard. To get a high level of academic level plays an absolutely essential role in one's upcoming life and future goals in general, which roots in doing well in lower level of education like school. With this in mind, I think the importance of getting good marks should not take for granted; school-age students should be rewarded for their efforts, and offering money by parents intrigue their motivation for studying and trying to get acceptable grades as a case in point.
It is crystal clear that setting a prize will be a powerful stimulation for children to do their best of their abilities and achieving specific goals. This argument lies in the reality of competition which is sadly absent in educational system these days. If this plan spreads out among families, all of young students for taking the advantage of money do their best in class, resulting in not only the improvement of knowledge these little generation but also taking part in class activities as well as discussions which makes the school classes more enjoyable.
Moreover, the effect of this prize of one's self-confidence could not be neglected. With money, not only one become familiar with managing it, but he or she feel they can depend on their own if they make use of their abilities as well, which will results in confidence because of knowing the fact that they can satisfy their need simply if they try their hardest,
Second, by setting a condition to get money, children, from their infancy stage of life, would learn it is not easy to make money. Nobody could overlook the troubles students are confronted in schools and studying, and particularly, elementary school students who used to invest their whole time to play and joy before school and now they are compelled to get grade a or B requiring extreme effort to do so. Therefore, offering money will be a trick for parents to upbringing skilled and successful students who learned to surmount formidable obstacles and to be perseverance to receive a valuable outcome, money in this case.
To sum up, apart from what was mentioned above, there are several reasons that make one subscribe to the idea of presenting students with money, but leading them study more eagerly and encourage their competition are more conspicuous inasmuch as these two reason are important in making a step forward toward success.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 344, Rule ID: ABSOLUTELY_ESSENTIAL[1]
Message: Use simply 'essential'.
Suggestion: essential
...a high level of academic level plays an absolutely essential role in ones upcoming life and future g...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 39, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
... Moreover, the effect of this prize of ones self-confidence could not be neglected....
^^^^
Line 3, column 156, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'she' must be used with a third-person verb: 'feels'.
Suggestion: feels
...amiliar with managing it, but he or she feel they can depend on their own if they ma...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, look, moreover, regarding, second, so, therefore, well, apart from, i think, in general, as well as, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 13.8261648746 123% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 43.0 43.0788530466 100% => OK
Preposition: 65.0 52.1666666667 125% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.0752688172 161% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2200.0 1977.66487455 111% => OK
No of words: 444.0 407.700716846 109% => OK
Chars per words: 4.95495495495 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.5903493882 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.61491433247 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 248.0 212.727598566 117% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.558558558559 0.524837075471 106% => OK
syllable_count: 679.5 618.680645161 110% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 9.59856630824 31% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 20.6003584229 53% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 40.0 20.1344086022 199% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 95.1519011766 48.9658058833 194% => OK
Chars per sentence: 200.0 100.406767564 199% => OK
Words per sentence: 40.3636363636 20.6045352989 196% => OK
Discourse Markers: 11.3636363636 5.45110844103 208% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.88709677419 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.362484049306 0.236089414692 154% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.13172011844 0.076458572812 172% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.081947234218 0.0737576698707 111% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.189602985726 0.150856017488 126% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0919698748097 0.0645574589148 142% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 22.1 11.7677419355 188% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 39.34 58.1214874552 68% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 17.7 10.1575268817 174% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.32 10.9000537634 113% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.43 8.01818996416 118% => OK
difficult_words: 107.0 86.8835125448 123% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.5 10.002688172 185% => OK
gunning_fog: 18.0 10.0537634409 179% => OK
text_standard: 18.0 10.247311828 176% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.