Some people think that family is the most important influence on young adults. Other people think that friends are the most important influence in young adults. Which view do you agree with? Use examples to support your position.
Adolescents are impacted not only by family but others also. Whose influence is more significant is a key question. While some people think that family is the primary factor, I feel otherwise since young adults spend more time with friends. That is coupled with their desires to split out of the family.
To begin with, the age of teens is highly diverse from others. In that age, children want to separate from families. They also want to show that they do not depend on their relatives. It happens, for many reasons. First is a biological necessity to create a new family. To do it, people should separate from parents and decide how to act by their own. For instance, children start arguing with the grown up to be cast out. This type of behavior was demonstrated by apes. Other reason is forming of a new personality. To create new, old has to be denied. Both of that causes reject all that is related with family. In other words, young adults try to find their place in life. As a result, adolescents do not pay attention to their families.
In addition, young adults frequently spend time in a company of friends than with relatives. Interests of a person change throughout all life and at teen’s age, we may think that parents do not understand us. However, everyone has to be understood. What is happening next is that children may look for emphasis in a sphere of friends. Their coevals face the same challenges, so we can say that they are in the one boat. This makes a fellowship of peers is more attractive for adolescents than a company of parents. For instance, children crimes are often caused by bad influence of people around adolescents. Many of those crimes may not happen if families impacted more than others. To clarify, an influence of people around a young adult is stronger than an impact of family on them.
To summarize, adolescents do not pay a lot of attention to their parents and they prefer to be in a company of friends. Both of that reasons makes me think that friends impacts on young adults more than family.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 56, Rule ID: ALSO_SENT_END[1]
Message: 'Also' is not used at the end of the sentence. Use 'as well' instead.
Suggestion: as well
... impacted not only by family but others also. Whose influence is more significant is...
^^^^
Line 1, column 62, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Whose” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ted not only by family but others also. Whose influence is more significant is a key ...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, look, may, so, while, as to, for instance, i feel, in addition, as a result, in other words, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 13.8261648746 29% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 43.0788530466 77% => OK
Preposition: 65.0 52.1666666667 125% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1697.0 1977.66487455 86% => OK
No of words: 364.0 407.700716846 89% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.66208791209 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.36792674256 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.56424957062 2.67179642975 96% => OK
Unique words: 180.0 212.727598566 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.494505494505 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 529.2 618.680645161 86% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 20.6003584229 136% => OK
Sentence length: 13.0 20.1344086022 65% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 24.9318202959 48.9658058833 51% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 60.6071428571 100.406767564 60% => OK
Words per sentence: 13.0 20.6045352989 63% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.89285714286 5.45110844103 90% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.88709677419 205% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.188308747351 0.236089414692 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0465076988775 0.076458572812 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0523726526542 0.0737576698707 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.13364963609 0.150856017488 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0475596806183 0.0645574589148 74% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 7.0 11.7677419355 59% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 66.74 58.1214874552 115% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.2 10.1575268817 71% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.86 10.9000537634 81% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.14 8.01818996416 89% => OK
difficult_words: 66.0 86.8835125448 76% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 5.0 10.002688172 50% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 7.2 10.0537634409 72% => OK
text_standard: 7.0 10.247311828 68% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.