Some young adult these days seek independence from their parents, while others actually prefer living with their family for longer periods. In my opinion, I think independence from the parents is better. I feel this way for several reasons which I will state in this essay.
To begin with I believe that it is very important for young adults to be independent from their families, this would teach them critical skills that otherwise would be hard to learn. For example my friend who is thirty years old now moved out from his parents house at the age of twenty five, too late I think, and as result, he is having problems adapting to the real world, where he need to manage utility bills, rent, cooking and a lot more. He often complaints to me about these things, and I believe he would not have been in this situation if he had moved out from his parents house earlier and learned to carry out basic responsibilities.
Secondly, I think once young adults are independent so many doors open for them, and they will become more bold with decisions they make and often take risks and explore their potential. I stand as a perfect example of this. when I was seventeen years old I was a shy young boy, I was afraid to go out of the house to meet new people, and in some cases even people I knew like friends and extended family members. However, this changed once I was forced to move out of my parents house, to go study in a far from home university. Once I found my self being able to communicate with other people my self confidence grew, and it renewed my view for life, I believe this experience made my a better person, a happier person, I traveled I have seen the world I took risks and I enjoyed life.
In conclusion I am of the opinion that it is a great idea for young adult to seek independence from their parents this is because it would help them develop critical skills, and because it provide opportunities for positive change.
- TOEFL integrated writing: Dutch painter Rembrandt 3
- Young people enjoy life more than older people do. 70
- Some young adults want to be independent as soon as possible. While others prefer to live with family member as long as they can. 70
- TPO-18 - Integrated Writing Task In the 1950s Torreya taxifoha, a type of evergreen tree once very common in the state of Florida, started to die out. No one is sure exactly what caused the decline, but chances are good that if nothing is done, Torreya wi 81
- Altruism is a type of behavior in which an animal sacrifices its own interest for that of another animal or group of animals. Altruism is the opposite of selfishness; individuals performing altruistic acts gain nothing for themselves. Examples of altruism 70
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 147, Rule ID: PERSONAL_OPINION_FRIENDSHIP[1]
Message: Use simply 'opinion'.
Suggestion: opinion
... their family for longer periods. In my personal opinion, i think independence from the parents ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 165, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...longer periods. In my personal opinion, i think independence from the parents is ...
^
Line 1, column 234, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun reason seems to be countable; consider using: 'several reasons'.
Suggestion: several reasons
... parents is better. I feel this way for several reason which i will state in the this essay. ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 255, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
... feel this way for several reason which i will state in the this essay. To beg...
^
Line 1, column 271, Rule ID: DT_DT[2]
Message: Maybe you need to remove the second determiner so that only 'the' or 'this' is left.
Suggestion: the; this
...or several reason which i will state in the this essay. To begin with i believe that ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 15, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...ate in the this essay. To begin with i believe that it is very important for y...
^
Line 3, column 184, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: For
... that otherwise would be hard to learn. for example my friend who is thirty years o...
^^^
Line 3, column 303, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...use at the age of twenty five, too late i think, and as result, he is having prob...
^
Line 3, column 446, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: He
...ty bills, rent, cooking and a lot more. he often complaints to me about these thin...
^^
Line 3, column 496, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...omplaints to me about these things, and i believe he would not have been in this ...
^
Line 5, column 188, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: I
...take risks and explore their potential. i stand as a perfect example of this. whe...
^
Line 5, column 188, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...take risks and explore their potential. i stand as a perfect example of this. whe...
^
Line 5, column 226, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: When
.... i stand as a perfect example of this. when i was seventeen years old i was shy you...
^^^^
Line 5, column 257, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...of this. when i was seventeen years old i was shy young boy, I was afraid to go o...
^
Line 5, column 364, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...w people, and in some cases even people i knew like friends and extended family m...
^
Line 5, column 413, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...ke friends and extended family members. however, this changed once i was forced to move...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 440, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...ily members. however, this changed once i was forced to move out of my parents ho...
^
Line 5, column 529, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Once
...go study in a far from home university. once i found my self being able to communica...
^^^^
Line 5, column 534, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...udy in a far from home university. once i found my self being able to communicate...
^
Line 5, column 652, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
... grew, and it renewed my view for life, i believe this experience made my a bette...
^
Line 5, column 721, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...e my a better person, a happier person, i traveled i have seen the world i took r...
^
Line 5, column 754, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...erson, i traveled i have seen the world i took risks i enjoyed life. In conclu...
^
Line 5, column 767, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...eled i have seen the world i took risks i enjoyed life. In conclusion i am of ...
^
Line 7, column 15, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
... risks i enjoyed life. In conclusion i am of the opinion that it is a great id...
^
Line 7, column 190, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'provides'?
Suggestion: provides
...develop critical skills, and because it provide opportunities for positive change.
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, however, if, second, secondly, so, while, as for, for example, i feel, i think, in conclusion, in some cases, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 63.0 43.0788530466 146% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 41.0 52.1666666667 79% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1600.0 1977.66487455 81% => OK
No of words: 356.0 407.700716846 87% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.49438202247 4.8611393121 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34372677135 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.42323110407 2.67179642975 91% => OK
Unique words: 195.0 212.727598566 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.547752808989 0.524837075471 104% => OK
syllable_count: 504.9 618.680645161 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 6.0 1.86738351254 321% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 20.6003584229 58% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 29.0 20.1344086022 144% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 70.8531344872 48.9658058833 145% => OK
Chars per sentence: 133.333333333 100.406767564 133% => OK
Words per sentence: 29.6666666667 20.6045352989 144% => OK
Discourse Markers: 11.0833333333 5.45110844103 203% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 25.0 5.5376344086 451% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.178425453252 0.236089414692 76% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0726498407888 0.076458572812 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0946354163737 0.0737576698707 128% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.12335539046 0.150856017488 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0682389727492 0.0645574589148 106% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.6 11.7677419355 124% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 58.96 58.1214874552 101% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.2 10.1575268817 120% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.35 10.9000537634 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.56 8.01818996416 94% => OK
difficult_words: 56.0 86.8835125448 64% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.6 10.0537634409 135% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.247311828 146% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.