Many young adults these days would like to start their lives by themselves without considering what truly happens in lack of preparation. Some young adults simply think independence from their parents gives them freedom, escaping from curfews and rules. However, I think living with their families for a longer time is better for young adults and it has several good aspects too.
In modern society, more and more competition increase rapidly and exist which every situation you are in. Even the old generation can not stand some situations give pressure them, how can the younger ones overcome those situations they will confront? I would suggest young adults use their time with their parents to prepare themselves for surviving in the society.
It is hard for young adults who don’t have any savings or jobs to live independently. Because living alone needs a bunch of money to keep your life from house to food. There are three things that you must maintain: house, food, and clothes. Although you can bring your clothes form your parents’ house, you can not bring food for days on end. Besides, taking a house from your parents is not a common sense in ordinary families. Therefore, you need money like income on a regular basis to pay rental fees of your houses and cars or to buy food and groceries.
Young adults have to deal with a lot of different people and circumstances as well without any help. If you decide to leave your nests and fly out, you should have a responsibility for your actions. It is not easy to handle all the matters that surround you. In my case, when I was in abroad living apart for the first time with my parents, I got a car accident on the road. Even though It was not that serious, I was panic. I did not know what to do and I felt running tears from my eyes. I should have been reasonable and rational for that moment to show off the counterpart of an accident. The counterpart saw me crying and tried to deceive me because he thought I am weak and naive. After all that happened, I realized that I was not ready to live alone.
Given that what I mentioned above, young adults can build their strengths and prepare themselves while living with their parents. Measure your abilities and figure out the state you are in whether you can leave your parents or not. It is important to be in a proper state and living with parents can make you be in the proper state.
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- Some young adults want independence from their parents as soon as possible. Other young adults prefer to live with their families for a longer time. Which of these situations do you think is better? 70
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- TOEFL T P O 5 - Integrated Writing Task 3
- It is more important to keep your old friends than to make new friends. 70
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 92, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Because” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... savings or jobs to live independently. Because living alone needs a bunch of money to ...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, first, however, if, so, therefore, well, while, after all, i think
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 13.8261648746 137% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 65.0 43.0788530466 151% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 55.0 52.1666666667 105% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1993.0 1977.66487455 101% => OK
No of words: 432.0 407.700716846 106% => OK
Chars per words: 4.61342592593 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55901411391 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.42168022415 2.67179642975 91% => OK
Unique words: 232.0 212.727598566 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.537037037037 0.524837075471 102% => OK
syllable_count: 609.3 618.680645161 98% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 24.3803412951 48.9658058833 50% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 83.0416666667 100.406767564 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.0 20.6045352989 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.125 5.45110844103 57% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 13.0 3.85842293907 337% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.432574439352 0.236089414692 183% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.112943423277 0.076458572812 148% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.116408845002 0.0737576698707 158% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.256534801952 0.150856017488 170% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.14488258141 0.0645574589148 224% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.3 11.7677419355 79% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 70.13 58.1214874552 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.9 10.1575268817 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.16 10.9000537634 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.38 8.01818996416 92% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 86.8835125448 90% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.