Some young people (14-18) tend to divide their free time to participate in several activities, such as competitive sports, piano, and dance classes. Others prefer to focus on one activity. Which one do you think is better?
There is no denying that all individuals, especially young ones, need to do activities they enjoy in their free time since, in this way, they can relieve their stress and anxiety caused by dealing with their heavy tasks and duties. With this in mind, I believe that it is more beneficial for young people aged fourteen to eighteen to do one particular activity in their free time rather than being involved in various activities. I feel this for some reasons, two of which are as follows:
First, dedicating their free time to one particular activity, young people can better manage their hectic schedule, so their essential and important tasks are not negatively affected, resulting in more satisfaction. To be more specific, due to vast advancements in many areas of knowledge and science, individuals, especially younger ones, encounter more complex and time-consuming duties, requiring them to allocate a great deal of their time and effort to address them properly. For example, students are assigned a lot of tough assignments and educational project in order to get high degrees in their education. In this situation, they have limited amount of free time to do their personal activities. If they invest their time in various activities, they don’t have enough time to be involved in homework. Leading them to fail in getting favorable results in their education. This may make them disappointed and also have negative effects on those activities they like to do. On the other hand, when they concentrate on one activity, they not only have adequate time to study and learn their educational materials, but they can also perform their desire activity in a good way , and this can give them an enjoyable feeling when they see they reach better outcomes in their necessary tasks and personal affairs.
Second, in this age of intense competition, youngsters, focusing on one specific skill or activity, are able to improve their proficiency and knowledge in that field significantly, increasing the chance of them being prosperous during their lives. To make it clear, in today’s competitive world, individuals try to achieve success in their lives as much as possible, requiring them to improve their abilities and experience considerably. In such circumstance, if youngster devote their time to one especial activity or skill, they are more likely to make progress because, in this way, they practice and learn that specific skill in much more time in comparison with participating in different activities. This helps them to be skillful in that field and make progress in their lives. For example if a young people try to learn a music instrument like piano over a long time and practice it regularly, they can teach their knowledge to others and earn money to satisfy their needs. However, when those who are involved in different activities, they are less likely to be skilled in activities they choose since they cannot learn any of them deeply due to lack of sufficient time to practice them.
In conclusion, I am the opinion that youngsters, aged fourteen to eighteen, should concentrate on one specific activity. This is because they have limited amount of time, and because they can better master and learn the activity they like to do.
- Some people believe that it is important to follow traditions even when those traditions conflict with or are quite different from their own individual preferences Other people believe that individual preferences are more important than traditions Which v 88
- Some young people 14 18 tend to divide their free time to participate in several activities such as competitive sports piano and dance classes Others prefer to focus on one activity Which one do you think is better 73
- Today we can see overconsumption of natural resources such as air freshwater oil and so on The usage is increasing at a very dangerous pace and is already reaching critical levels What are the reasons contributing to this what should be done to minimize t 73
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 458, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...a great deal of their time and effort to address them properly. For example, stud...
^^
Line 4, column 1183, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...form their desire activity in a good way , and this can give them an enjoyable fee...
^^
Line 6, column 911, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...time and practice it regularly, they can teach their knowledge to others and earn...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, may, second, so, for example, i feel, in conclusion, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 22.0 13.8261648746 159% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 77.0 43.0788530466 179% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 85.0 52.1666666667 163% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2731.0 1977.66487455 138% => OK
No of words: 536.0 407.700716846 131% => OK
Chars per words: 5.09514925373 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.81161862636 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77737735914 2.67179642975 104% => OK
Unique words: 248.0 212.727598566 117% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.462686567164 0.524837075471 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 862.2 618.680645161 139% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 11.0 4.94265232975 223% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 29.0 20.1344086022 144% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 77.8713128053 48.9658058833 159% => OK
Chars per sentence: 151.722222222 100.406767564 151% => OK
Words per sentence: 29.7777777778 20.6045352989 145% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.61111111111 5.45110844103 103% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.23573445164 0.236089414692 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0935216831834 0.076458572812 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0557672966169 0.0737576698707 76% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.172783909109 0.150856017488 115% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0435392424029 0.0645574589148 67% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.5 11.7677419355 149% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.04 58.1214874552 72% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 10.1575268817 144% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.89 10.9000537634 118% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.37 8.01818996416 104% => OK
difficult_words: 112.0 86.8835125448 129% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 20.0 10.002688172 200% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.6 10.0537634409 135% => OK
text_standard: 20.0 10.247311828 195% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.