TPO-20 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Successful people try new things and take risks rather than only doing what they know how to do well. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Successful people are always appreciated by others. It’s worth knowing what is the main characteristics of these people. One of these is that successful people try new things and take risks rather than doing what they know how to do well. While some disagree with this statement, I strongly support it for some reasons.
First, nowadays technology is changing fast, new skills and new products are required. Technologies and science are developing, so skills which job market needs will change. So, rapidly changing the way things get done. It is worthful to be in front of this changing and try to learn and do a new thing. For instance, my father didn’t know how to use a computer when it entered Iran and when many offices replaced it with traditional handwritten letters. As a result, his position changed in his office and he retired one year sooner. If he learned using a computer, maybe he would get a higher position and retired with a higher salary. Besides, the innovation of products has a high fast. Investing in new products has risks, but it is essential for remaining in markets. For instance, sometimes Nokia was one of the biggest company in the mobile market. I remember, when I wanted to buy a mobile, everyone suggested me to buy the Nokia brand. But, this company bankrupted because it couldn’t compete with other companies which developed new products. Therefore, being update and try to do a new thing is an important attribute for being successful.
Second, doing new thing flourish our talents. There is no opportunity for people who do the same thing all the time and don’t take a risk, to improve and develop their abilities. But others who choose to do new work or invent a new thing, have to get new information and knowledge. They will face many problems. They should learn how to solve them and As a result, they become more creative. For instance, Mark Zuckerburg who is a founder of Facebook. He should improve his abilities in writing codes for his new software. Furthermore, he faced some problems such as many crises. But, he stood and finally, he succeeded.
To sum up, I believe that one of the main characteristics of successful people is doing a new thing and take a risk. It causes adaptation to advance technologies and flourishing talents.

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Average: 7 (1 vote)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 555, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to use'.
Suggestion: to use
... retired one year sooner. If he learned using a computer, maybe he would get a higher...
^^^^^
Line 2, column 685, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...esides, the innovation of products has a high fast. Investing in new products has...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, but, finally, first, furthermore, if, may, second, so, therefore, well, while, for instance, such as, as a result, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 13.8261648746 137% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 43.0788530466 88% => OK
Preposition: 32.0 52.1666666667 61% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1914.0 1977.66487455 97% => OK
No of words: 394.0 407.700716846 97% => OK
Chars per words: 4.8578680203 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.45527027702 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80300965014 2.67179642975 105% => OK
Unique words: 211.0 212.727598566 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.535532994924 0.524837075471 102% => OK
syllable_count: 592.2 618.680645161 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 20.6003584229 136% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 20.1344086022 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 28.9359558476 48.9658058833 59% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 68.3571428571 100.406767564 68% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.0714285714 20.6045352989 68% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.75 5.45110844103 87% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 12.0 4.88709677419 246% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.312411267469 0.236089414692 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0802869382447 0.076458572812 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.112281333017 0.0737576698707 152% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.235265257484 0.150856017488 156% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.111259485822 0.0645574589148 172% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.5 11.7677419355 72% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 65.73 58.1214874552 113% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.6 10.1575268817 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.32 10.9000537634 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.14 8.01818996416 102% => OK
difficult_words: 95.0 86.8835125448 109% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 10.002688172 60% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 7.6 10.0537634409 76% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.