By and large, parents wish their children to reach the zenith of the education and have a better future, so they try to provide the best condition for them to have a better school performance. Their marks are the best measure of their function in school, and all parents try to encourage their children to get higher marks. There are many controversial debates about what is the best method for motivating students to study hard and getting high grades. While some people claim that giving money is an effective way for this purpose, the others hold the opposite view. To my way of thinking, this method is not a good idea because not only so irresponsible become the children, but also after a while, they will not be motivated by the money anymore.
The first reason should be stated here is that studying is the only duty of school-age children and if the parents offer money to them, the school-age adolescent will think studying is a gift to their parents. In this way, they could not understand their responsibilities in the life and without getting money, they would not undertake even tiny tasks. For instance, my cousin is a very clever person but when he was a child, his mother proposed him money for each high grade in school, before this offer he had got good grades but he was not the best in his class. After my aunt's offer, he started studying very hard that changed him to a hard-worker student and he got top marks in all his courses. With that being said, next semester her mother took her suggestion back. He, who studied just for money, did not study anymore and he failed all his courses. When his mother asked him why did not you study enough, he answered there is no difference between high and low grades, because both of them are free!
The other point worth discussing here is that after a while money cannot encourage the teenagers to study hard. It is a proven fact that even the rich children are not successful in their schools and universities, because they think why should I study while I have a plethora of money. If the parents offer their children money for the high grades, they will become indifferent after some while and they think they have enough money. The most noticeable output is that money which should be gained by working is obtained by doing what they have to do as their duty, so they would not understand it's value. To exemplify, When I was a child in the school, I wanted a Sony PlayStation, I asked my parents to buy it for me if I could get complete marks in all my courses; however, they refuted my propose and told me to study hard to get a good job and buy whatever you want for yourself. This sentence made me a powerful person and I have been trying to work hard. I have changed because of that reputation.
To put all in one, offering money for high grades has decreased the value of studying for children and makes them irresponsible and will destroy their motivation in the long run.
- TPO-40 - Independent Writing Task Some parent offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school Do you think this is a good idea?Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 70
- TPO-40 - Independent Writing Task Some parent offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school Do you think this is a good idea?Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 73
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?In the past, young people depended too much on their parents to make decisions for them; today young people are better able to make decisions about their own lives. 73
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, so, while, for instance, by and large
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 15.1003584229 159% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 13.8261648746 137% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 78.0 43.0788530466 181% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 51.0 52.1666666667 98% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2418.0 1977.66487455 122% => OK
No of words: 535.0 407.700716846 131% => OK
Chars per words: 4.51962616822 4.8611393121 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.80937282943 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.41093238944 2.67179642975 90% => OK
Unique words: 237.0 212.727598566 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.442990654206 0.524837075471 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 741.6 618.680645161 120% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 3.51792114695 227% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 28.0 20.1344086022 139% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 60.9965259444 48.9658058833 125% => OK
Chars per sentence: 127.263157895 100.406767564 127% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.1578947368 20.6045352989 137% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.57894736842 5.45110844103 66% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.346703046379 0.236089414692 147% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.115200608975 0.076458572812 151% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0768826012616 0.0737576698707 104% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.227121133813 0.150856017488 151% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0394729009756 0.0645574589148 61% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.9 11.7677419355 118% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.98 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.8 10.1575268817 116% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.23 10.9000537634 85% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.5 8.01818996416 94% => OK
difficult_words: 84.0 86.8835125448 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 10.002688172 135% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 10.0537634409 131% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.247311828 137% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.