What change would make to your hometown more appealing to people your age? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.
Many people dislike change, yet that change only makes the difference. Several cities of world are enduring to make their city better place for their local populace. With the same zeal I would like my city to pass a law to the corporate offices to have child – care in their office premises, less crowded activity parks and museums. I discern that this change will help women’s of my age as well their children. Further in my essay I will be annexing my elucidation about the changes I desire to be in my city for my age scale women.
Inflation is accelerating with developing world therefore both the partners have to work for earning their bread and butter. Many companies are establishing in my city Ahmedbad, India. Avalanche of new companies have resulted boost in the job market in my city. But it is unfortunate that none of the companies has day - care facility for their employees in their buildings. It is little inconvenient for the women who have to leave their three or four year kids at home or keep them away from their sight. In this bothering, women’s are not able to concentrate in their work as such I consider this change imperative. By doing so companies as well as employees both will be benefited. If Government of Gujarat will pass the law to all companies of the state to grant day –care facility to their employees, it will be the first state in India to take that initiative.
Dense Green Park enhances the beauty of the city, my city has built various parks but none of the park has been made to take relaxing walk or sit in the park to enjoy tranquility. All most all the parks of my city remains crowded with couples or families with kids. As I deemed by city most blustering city of Gujarat, it must have some park for walking and amusement activity like fishing. It would help crowd of my age to do meditation, jogging, observing some sunlight and enjoying serenity. Fishing will be new as well as adventurous for city crowd and me, also it is an activity that can be done with family and friends.
I want few historical museum to be built in my city as it could be very good source of knowledge about important historical aspect happen in entire state of Gujarat. Also it will help us to be connected with our linguistic and ancestral world. For instance Museum can be constructed about Mahatma Gandhi’s effort as freedom fighter.
Development is never ending process therefore my city Ahmedabd that is deemed as mega city must make effort to serve some facilities required by women alike me - studying and working mothers. These changes can make it illegible for Metro city. It will be bilateral benefit for both of us.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 26 in 30
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 472 350
No. of Characters: 2137 1500
No. of Different Words: 230 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.661 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.528 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.442 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 126 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 101 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 70 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 45 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.667 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.061 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.417 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.293 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.445 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.093 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5