Question: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Boys and girls should attend separate schools. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Attending school is one of the most important part of every child's life. They are where we learn and grow up. Even though some people believe that boys and girls should attend a same school, some disagree. In my view, different genders should attend separate schools for two key reasons.
First is focus. When male and female students study together, they tend to impress each other in many ways such as their look and strength. And, this may affect their grades and their learning process. For instance, in my country, Iran, girls and boys must attend separate schools till the end of their highschools. When I was 16, I was accepted to a very competitive highschool. We were supposed to finish tons of homeworks everyday. We had no break and the university entrance exam, which is called Konkoor, was approaching. All we had to worry was our grades and our progress. None of the students in that institute never worried about what to wear or how to impress a guy. We had one and only one goal: success. As a result, when we took the exam, at the end of the year, all of us succeeded. Most of my friends were accepted to the most prestigious universities. This experience taught me that attending a school with only boys or girls can be really beneficial in terms of success.
Second is benefits of limited relationship between two genders. So many studies demonstrated that when girls and boys study in a same school, they attract each other, both physically and emotionally. This can lead to have numerous number of teenager moms. Girls who become pregnant not only impact their future negatively by not being able to go college but they also affect the society because the rate of mothers who die during their labor increases. I remember watching a documentary about a girl who was pregnant from her highschool boy friend. She was only 15. They had such a hard time to decide to keep the baby or abort the unwanted baby. The girl and her boyfriend decided to raise the baby together. But, down the road, the father of kid left his family and the mother was supposed to raise her son. Her life was such a tragedy. She wanted to attend a medical school but she was not able to do it. Even though with the help of her mom she was able to attend a college, but her grades were not good enough to be accepted to any medical school. Finally, she decided to work as a bar tender since with her background and resume she couldn't find a better job. Her financial status was not decent at all which placed a huge impact on her son's education as well. With her low income, she was not able to afford to send her son to better schools. As you can see, attending a schools with boys and girls can have a vast impact on people's life.
In conclusion, different genders must attend different schools not only because does this help their education but it also help them to avoid early pregnancy and problems related to that. We should all recommend and educate all of the parents to send their children to schools with only one gender.
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Even though with the help of her mom she was able to attend a college, but her grades were not good enough
Description: don't put 'though' 'but' in one sentence.
not only because does this help their education but it also help them to avoid early pregnancy and problems related to that.
Description: 'Not only...but also' is not used properly. can you re-write this sentence? (You can use 'neither...nor' or 'either...or')
Sentence: When I was 16, I was accepted to a very competitive highschool.
Error: highschool Suggestion: high school
Sentence: I remember watching a documentary about a girl who was pregnant from her highschool boy friend.
Error: highschool Suggestion: high school
flaws:
No. of Words: 548 350
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 25 in 30
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 35 15
No. of Words: 548 350
No. of Characters: 2419 1500
No. of Different Words: 273 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.838 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.414 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.297 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 159 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 104 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 64 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 35 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.657 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.998 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.457 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.23 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.363 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.164 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5