If you could invent something new, what product would you develop?
What could be better than invention in this world? Inventing a new device, we can serve humanity, reaching a high level of satisfaction. Perfunctory glance to the history reveals that nothing is important rather than the serve of inventors like Edison, Turing and go forth. Indeed, we are their invention debtors, because of the convenience they brought to our life. Although, being as an inventor is beyond of my mind, but if I could push the technology ahead, I would spend my time on creating a surgical device to both detect people’s cancer cells and find the way of its treatment.
Imposing in a vanguard place among my reasons, curing people and surviving them from incurable disease is the best doing in this world. The advent of plenty of human achievements in revolutionized way like variegated cars and firms in this era accompanied with releasing much pollution to environment, producing chemical substances. In fact, even though we have access to volume amount of enhancement that facilitated our life but we inadvertently have had impact on our life with many hazardous consequences of this promotion such as pollution that might be of main reasons of cancer.
Additionally, we are witnessing of death of a vast majority of people from cancer. The widespread range of people from child to the elderly people attacks this mortal enemy. Seeing an innocent child dyeing in front of us without having any chance of experiencing of live, radically burns my heart. Therefore, stopping the improvement of this disease is one important problem, which preoccupied my whole mind, consequently thinking about finding way to defeat it.
What's more, it is for a long period that researchers although allocate a lot of time and numerous efforts to find a way to diagnose this evil disorder, but unfortunately they have never been successful and up to now, no precise way of recuperation of this disease have been find. Furthermore, we can associate in this field of research, accelerating human to reach this heal swiftly.
In nutshell, taking all aforementioned reasons into account, it could be concluded that returning one back from the death edge is of paramount events due to my standpoint. Therefore, I am really anxious to find a device to diagnose cancer, because it base been the pivot reason of death of human in recent century.
- TPO 8 independent 80
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Sentence: The widespread range of people from child to the elderly people attacks this mortal enemy.
Description: The fragment people attacks this is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace attacks with verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
flaws:
You can make the reasons simper. You can apply following reasons to almost any essays or speakings:
save time (or waste time);
same money (or waste money);
get more info;
make friends;
find a job;
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 24 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 389 350
No. of Characters: 1905 1500
No. of Different Words: 225 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.441 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.897 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.833 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 137 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 97 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 73 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 51 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.312 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.251 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.375 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.304 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.558 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.141 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5