The following is a recommendation from the Board of Directors of Monarch Books.
"We recommend that Monarch Books open a café in its store. Monarch, having been in business at the same location for more than twenty years, has a large customer base because it is known for its wide selection of books on all subjects. Clearly, opening the café would attract more customers. Space could be made for the café by discontinuing the children's book section, which will probably become less popular given that the most recent national census indicated a significant decline in the percentage of the population under age ten. Opening a café will allow Monarch to attract more customers and better compete with Regal Books, which recently opened its own café."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
While it may be true that by adding a café in its bookstore, Monarch books could increase the number of customers, the argument does not make a cogent case to persuade Monarch books to replace their children section for a café store. It is easy to understand why people would want to drink a coffee while reading a book, but the argument is based on poor and unbacked criteria that it may not convince people to close the children section entirely.
The argument starts by contradicting itself by mentioning that Monarch books are popular due to its large selection of books. By removing an entire book section, they would be “removing” some of its popularity. A decrease in popularity will mean a decrease in costumers, the opposite of what the board of directors is trying to accomplish. Therefore, the first question that the board of directors need to ask themselves is if it is worth removing something that made them successful over the years.
The board of directors seem to be clearly convinced that by replacing the children section with a café will allow them to have more customers. They support this claim by mentioning the national census and how it shows the decline on the population under age ten. However, this cannot be taken for granted. The reasons why the census shows a decline on the population under ten could be due to various reasons that could change in the following years. It is true a census could be used to predict an outcome, but that outcome could also be entirely different at the end.
Last but not least, they mention that by opening a café Monarch books could better compete with Regal Books since Regal Books already has a cafe. What they lack to mention, though, is whether Regal Books discontinued any of their book sections. What if they did not? Then their competition will have a huge advantage over Monarch books since they have all their book sections intact and a café.
A good café within a bookstore with tasty coffee drinks are sure to increase the number of visitors and will definitely provide a more pleasant visit for its visitors. However, the authors of this argument are not likely to convince anybody of replacing a children book section for a café.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
the arguments are not exactly right on the point.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 385 350
No. of Characters: 1788 1500
No. of Different Words: 175 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.43 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.644 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.436 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 119 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 96 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 61 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 31 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.647 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.133 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.529 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.309 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.309 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.098 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 511, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...at made them successful over the years. The board of directors seem to be clearl...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, may, so, then, therefore, while, it is true
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 36.0 28.8173652695 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 55.0 55.5748502994 99% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1848.0 2260.96107784 82% => OK
No of words: 385.0 441.139720559 87% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.8 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.4296068528 4.56307096286 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.61783392865 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 182.0 204.123752495 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.472727272727 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 565.2 705.55239521 80% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.4636633121 57.8364921388 87% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.705882353 119.503703932 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.6470588235 23.324526521 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.35294117647 5.70786347227 76% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.249378761006 0.218282227539 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0790618062095 0.0743258471296 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0642531527709 0.0701772020484 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.137214236062 0.128457276422 107% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0430093209466 0.0628817314937 68% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.5 14.3799401198 87% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 48.3550499002 119% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.86 12.5979740519 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.64 8.32208582834 92% => OK
difficult_words: 71.0 98.500998004 72% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 17.5 12.3882235529 141% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.