Some young children spend a great amount of their time participating in sports. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this.
Although it is generally believed that job helps a person acquire crucial qualities, the question remains whether working from young ages is useful. While some people think that this will harm teenagers, many others argue that the benefits outweigh the possible drawbacks. personally, I am prone to believe that part-time job is extremely useful for children. I hold this opinion for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
To begin with, children have a lot of free time that should be used wisely. thus, studying in the school, playing for sports and other essential activities make children busy for a part of the day. The remaining time is used to watch television and to play video games - activities with no usefulness. moreover, the mentioned forms of activities very often harm children's health. my own experience is a compelling example of this. when I was young, I used to play video games day and night; as a result this fact negatively influenced my physical and mental health. So, part-time working may be an ideal solution for keeping children /away/ from harmful activities.
Additionally, working from young ages helps children gain knowledge and skills necessary for successful career. it is obvious that any kind of job makes children more aware of the world. moreover, any kind of systematic work develops skills such as patience, helpfulness and discipline - traits without which children's future career is impossible. For instance, my cousin started working in a law firm when he was 14. Even though his functions were not directly linked to legal practice, however the knowledge and skills he obtained there contributed to his career seriously. thus, after graduating the law faculty of the university, he was immediately offered a full-time position the mentioned legal company.
To sum up briefly, it is a fact that working is essential for every human being. it is also true that working from young ages has serious advantages. Its explanation is twofold: first, working keeps children from other harmful activities, and, second, it helps children obtain qualities necessary for adult life.
- Life is easier and more comfortable than it was when our grandparents were children. 70
- TPO 33: CARVED STONE BALLSReading:Carved stone balls are a curious type of artifact found at a number of locations in Scotland. They date from the late Neolithic period, around 4,000 years ago. They are round in shape; they were carved from several types 81
- TOEFL T P O 27 - Integrated Writing Task 3
- At present young people devote less time to helping their communities. 70
- Because the world is changing so quickly, people now are less happy or less satisfied with their lives than people were in the past. 78
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 274, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Personally
...nefits outweigh the possible drawbacks. personally, I am prone to believe that part-time j...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 77, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Thus
...f free time that should be used wisely. thus, studying in the school, playing for sp...
^^^^
Line 3, column 303, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Moreover
... games - activities with no usefulness. moreover, the mentioned forms of activities very...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 381, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: My
...ities very often harm childrens health. my own experience is a compelling example ...
^^
Line 3, column 432, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: When
...rience is a compelling example of this. when I was young, I used to play video games...
^^^^
Line 5, column 113, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...skills necessary for successful career. it is obvious that any kind of job makes c...
^^
Line 5, column 188, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Moreover
...makes children more aware of the world. moreover, any kind of systematic work develops s...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 577, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Thus
...re contributed to his career seriously. thus, after graduating the law faculty of th...
^^^^
Line 7, column 82, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...ing is essential for every human being. it is also true that working from young ag...
^^
Line 7, column 314, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ain qualities necessary for adult life.
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, briefly, but, first, however, if, may, moreover, second, so, thus, while, for instance, kind of, such as, as a result, to begin with, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 15.1003584229 119% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 9.8082437276 41% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 43.0788530466 72% => OK
Preposition: 29.0 52.1666666667 56% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1801.0 1977.66487455 91% => OK
No of words: 346.0 407.700716846 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.20520231214 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.31289638616 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.71971335474 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 207.0 212.727598566 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.598265895954 0.524837075471 114% => OK
syllable_count: 545.4 618.680645161 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 33.7879786315 48.9658058833 69% => OK
Chars per sentence: 90.05 100.406767564 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.3 20.6045352989 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.45 5.45110844103 137% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 10.0 5.5376344086 181% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.142777018497 0.236089414692 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0475573532168 0.076458572812 62% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0264648591088 0.0737576698707 36% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0909478251055 0.150856017488 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0296008655878 0.0645574589148 46% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.8 11.7677419355 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 58.1214874552 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.64 10.9000537634 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.86 8.01818996416 110% => OK
difficult_words: 96.0 86.8835125448 110% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.