Tpo15:
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
In order to become financially responsible adults, children should learn to manage their own money at young age.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Financial affairs are one of the important parts of humans' lives. Everybody has their own effort to spend their money in an effective way. It has long been said that spending money is much easier than making money. In this regard, there is a controversy among scholars which we should teach our children to manage their money when they are a child. However, others hold exactly the opposite point of view. they point out that children can learn how to manage their money when they grow up. From my perspective, children should be taught to manage their money to become a responsible person in their future lives. In the following paragraphs, I will elaborate on my viewpoint by providing two conspicuous reasons.
one of the most important reasons that worth shed light on is that there are some basic behaviors in which they are has originated from our childhood. there is some kind of habits that will not change in the long run and they are fixed for the whole life. I believe that managing money is one of these behaviors. Thus, we should teach our kids to manage their properties to become a financially responsible person in their adulthood. For instance, a friend of mine who had a rich father, he never thought about how to manage his money because there was an unlimited source of wealth. After years, he got a job and he became independent, but, he always was in trouble with his bills because he could not manage his financial affair and his income was limited as well.
Second, financial responsibility has some effects on other aspects of life. A good financial manager has an ability to manage other aspects of life as well as the financial affair. Based on a recent survey conducted in my country, statistics show that ninety percent of candidates who claim that they have a good managing ability of their money, they are successful in their job environment, eighty percent of them has promoted more quickly and sixty-five percent of them are holding a managing position.
All in all, children who have been taught at their young age to managing their money are more responsible in the future life. some of our behavior doesn't change over time so we should consider that if we want to grow a responsible person, we should teach them at the very young age of theirs. financial responsibility has a direct effect on other aspects of our lives and this responsibility can affect our lives positively. The more financially responsible a person is, the more successful he is.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 119, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in an effective way" with adverb for "effective"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...s their own effort to spend their money in an effective way. It has long been said that spending mo...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 407, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
...old exactly the opposite point of view. they point out that children can learn how t...
^^^^
Line 6, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: One
...iding two conspicuous reasons. one of the most important reasons that wort...
^^^
Line 6, column 152, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
... are has originated from our childhood. there is some kind of habits that will not ch...
^^^^^
Line 6, column 646, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[5]
Message: The adverb 'always' is usually put after the verb 'was'.
Suggestion: was always
... job and he became independent, but, he always was in trouble with his bills because he co...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 16, column 127, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Some
...re more responsible in the future life. some of our behavior doesnt change over time...
^^^^
Line 16, column 148, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...n the future life. some of our behavior doesnt change over time so we should consider ...
^^^^^^
Line 16, column 294, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Financial
...h them at the very young age of theirs. financial responsibility has a direct effect on o...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, second, so, thus, well, for instance, kind of, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 15.1003584229 139% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 13.8261648746 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 63.0 43.0788530466 146% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 58.0 52.1666666667 111% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2087.0 1977.66487455 106% => OK
No of words: 432.0 407.700716846 106% => OK
Chars per words: 4.83101851852 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55901411391 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60408230316 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 205.0 212.727598566 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.474537037037 0.524837075471 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 652.5 618.680645161 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 58.2546991866 48.9658058833 119% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.380952381 100.406767564 99% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.5714285714 20.6045352989 100% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.57142857143 5.45110844103 66% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.5376344086 144% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.265069338978 0.236089414692 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0859089723597 0.076458572812 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.063069222914 0.0737576698707 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.168364736767 0.150856017488 112% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0499012996346 0.0645574589148 77% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 11.7677419355 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.73 10.9000537634 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.33 8.01818996416 91% => OK
difficult_words: 74.0 86.8835125448 85% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.002688172 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.