For success in a future job it is more important to relate well with others than to study hard in school
The success in career depends on various factors. In this regard, some people think that good communication skills are a decisive factor. Meanwhile, many others argue that the importance of knowledge gained at the university prevails over other circumstances. Personally, I am prone to believe that studying hard in school or at university is the most significant factor leading to successful career. I hold this opinion for several reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
To begin with, knowledge that we gain at university may be obtained by no other means than studying hard. Many people may have experience or inherited communicative skills, which are also essential for success. However, knowledge is gained only through education. That in turn gives us relative advantage over other people, who do not have it. For instance, when I first started to work many of my colleagues were much more experienced as compared to me. But the fact that I learned better gave me advantage over them. So, studying hard is the key to success.
Also, studying well develops some important skills that other workers do not have. Skills such as consistency and commitment are indispensable elements for career growth. My own experience is a compelling example of this. Studying day and night shaped my character, and I became a more disciplined person. Thanks to this I was the most successful lawyer in the legal company where I worked for a while. Thus, skills obtained at the university helped me succeed.
Finally, high grades we get at university helps us find a job. This is explained by the fact that employers pay much attention to the prospective employees’ grades, and hire those ones who have proved to be good students. The relevant studies confirm this claim, too. For example, the research conducted by Harvard University Human Resources Center shows that the students who graduated with honors find a job within three months after leaving university. Meanwhile, other students are being hired within a period of time from six months to one year. So studying well is essential for success.
To sum up briefly, studying hard is essential for our future. Its explanation is twofold: first, knowledge and some skills may be obtained only thanks to proper education; second, good grades help find a job.
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- TOEFL T P O 27 - Integrated Writing Task 3
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 483, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to better', 'to well'
Suggestion: to better; to well
...ared to me. But the fact that I learned better gave me advantage over them. So, studyi...
^^^^^^
Line 4, column 179, Rule ID: THESE_ONES[1]
Message: This phrase is probably grammatically incorrect. Write 'those' instead.
Suggestion: those
...ective employees' grades, and hire those ones who have proved to be good students. Th...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 512, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...other students are being hired within a period of time from six months to one year. So studyin...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, briefly, but, finally, first, however, if, may, second, so, thus, well, while, for example, for instance, such as, to begin with, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 15.1003584229 119% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 9.8082437276 41% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 43.0788530466 88% => OK
Preposition: 42.0 52.1666666667 81% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1945.0 1977.66487455 98% => OK
No of words: 382.0 407.700716846 94% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.09162303665 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.42095241839 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79273734354 2.67179642975 105% => OK
Unique words: 219.0 212.727598566 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.573298429319 0.524837075471 109% => OK
syllable_count: 602.1 618.680645161 97% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 20.6003584229 126% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 20.1344086022 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 37.8888322526 48.9658058833 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 74.8076923077 100.406767564 75% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.6923076923 20.6045352989 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.57692307692 5.45110844103 102% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 20.0 11.8709677419 168% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.333142578718 0.236089414692 141% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0842811236424 0.076458572812 110% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0774239398534 0.0737576698707 105% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.173628875588 0.150856017488 115% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0419877072396 0.0645574589148 65% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.9 11.7677419355 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.27 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.8 10.1575268817 87% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.65 10.9000537634 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.42 8.01818996416 105% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 86.8835125448 114% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 7.6 10.0537634409 76% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.