In some countries, teenagers have jobs while they are still students. Do you think this is a good idea? Support your opinion by using specific reasons and details.
Entering an occupation for adolescents while they are students is a controversial topic in modern society. Generally speaking, vocation is the most important part of someone’s life, either in school days or after that. Some people believe that working may have negative effects while attending school or college, others stand at the other side of the continuum, holding the view that working provides lots of advantages for students while they are studying. As far as I am concerned, I agree with the latter opinion and the reasons to substantiate my view point are elaborated upon hereunder.
The first point that I would like to describe is that earning income is an obvious benefit of having a job, which is more than likely why students consider having a job in the first place. This is because the money that they make from the job while studying could help them to cover the cost of tuition, school supplies, accommodation, food, travel expenses, and just about other expenditures. Even if they are being educated with the full scholarship it would not hurt to earn extra bucks. A personal experience of mine is a compelling example of this. I studied in Tabriz University almost about four years ago and in those days I had a desire to get a part-time job, therefore after a while I decided to be employed in a small corporation related to my field. Having occupied in a company and earning money, I bought a laptop; which it was so useful for me because it led me to success by providing a condition that I was able to search and read helpful theses on the internet to write a comprehensive and practicable thesis.
Secondly, in addition to making money, having a job gives students a full immersion into the world of work. Whether the profession that they get is relevant to their field or not; they will specialize in a special field or get to experience the type of teamwork and hierarchical systematic processes that all come together to accomplish one goal in the end. As well as students will get a glimpse of how meritocracy system in a workplace, that is, rewards attributed to the hard work which usually manifests in the form of acknowledgement, bonuses, promotions, etc. As I said, I used to work in a construction firm as a site superintendent during my education. These company had foreign personnel too, who had different culture and language from me. Working in this circumstance, I learned how to speak English, that it provided a particular privilege for me because after graduating I was able to be employed in an international corporation. Put in other words, the more skillful and proficient get an individual in a specific field, the easier successful he or she will be in his or her future career.
By perusing the above paragraphs, it can be included that having a job while educating leads to a much better outcome. In the sake of brevity, a couple of points are worth reiterating: first, students will make money; secondly, they will get expertise in their chosen field.
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2020-01-15 | ekakilli | 65 | view |
2020-01-15 | ekakilli | 73 | view |
2019-08-28 | S_Daftari | 73 | view |
2019-04-10 | edsonsimoes | 60 | view |
2019-04-08 | Reza partovi | 88 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
Entering an occupation for adolescents w...
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Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...point are elaborated upon hereunder. The first point that I would like to des...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 400, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[2]
Message: “Even if” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ses, and just about other expenditures. Even if they are being educated with the full s...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...mprehensive and practicable thesis. Secondly, in addition to making money, h...
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Line 5, column 667, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this company' or 'These companies'?
Suggestion: This company; These companies
...ite superintendent during my education. These company had foreign personnel too, who had diff...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...will be in his or her future career. By perusing the above paragraphs, it can...
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Line 7, column 274, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to field'
Suggestion: to field
...they will get expertise in their chosen field.
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, may, second, secondly, so, therefore, well, while, in addition, as well as, in other words, in the first place
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 15.1003584229 146% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 56.0 43.0788530466 130% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 70.0 52.1666666667 134% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.0752688172 161% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2501.0 1977.66487455 126% => OK
No of words: 519.0 407.700716846 127% => OK
Chars per words: 4.81888246628 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.7730044521 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.91482358884 2.67179642975 109% => OK
Unique words: 283.0 212.727598566 133% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.54527938343 0.524837075471 104% => OK
syllable_count: 793.8 618.680645161 128% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 20.1344086022 134% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 59.1630921111 48.9658058833 121% => OK
Chars per sentence: 131.631578947 100.406767564 131% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.3157894737 20.6045352989 133% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.63157894737 5.45110844103 122% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.153586768813 0.236089414692 65% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0457690252512 0.076458572812 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0310930559156 0.0737576698707 42% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0961914504412 0.150856017488 64% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0273105342924 0.0645574589148 42% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.9 11.7677419355 127% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 58.1214874552 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 10.1575268817 124% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.97 10.9000537634 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.84 8.01818996416 110% => OK
difficult_words: 127.0 86.8835125448 146% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 10.0537634409 127% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 88.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 26.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.