The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Essay topics:

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

The bar chart shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age group who did regular physical activity in 2010. Overall, it’s obvious that the percentage of women who did regular physical was always higher than the percentage of men in any age group except the age group from 15 to24.
Starting with the male group,a downward trend has been showed in age group from 15-24(52.8%) to 35-44(39.5%),however,the percentage from 35-44 to 65 and over has showed a upward trend ,it’s from 39% to 46.7%.And the percentage was nearly equal to the female group in 65 and over group.
Turning now to the next group,which is the female group.From 15-44 to 45-54,the percentage of people who did regular physical was raising from 47.7% to 53.3%,reached the top in the group of 45-54.However, the percentage showed a downward trend from 45-54 and finally flat with male group at 47.1%.

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Average: 6.1 (1 vote)
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Essays by user Frank Chen :

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 29, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , a
...m 15 to24. Starting with the male group,a downward trend has been showed in age g...
^^
Line 2, column 113, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , the
...up from 15-2452.8% to 35-4439.5%,however,the percentage from 35-44 to 65 and over ha...
^^^^
Line 2, column 166, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...ge from 35-44 to 65 and over has showed a upward trend ,it's from 39% to 46....
^
Line 2, column 180, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...to 65 and over has showed a upward trend ,it's from 39% to 46.7%.And the perc...
^^
Line 2, column 209, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: And
...ward trend ,it's from 39% to 46.7%.And the percentage was nearly equal to the ...
^^^
Line 3, column 30, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , which
...er group. Turning now to the next group,which is the female group.From 15-44 to 45-54...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 56, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: From
...he next group,which is the female group.From 15-44 to 45-54,the percentage of people...
^^^^
Line 3, column 196, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: However
...%,reached the top in the group of 45-54.However, the percentage showed a downward trend...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, however, if

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 5.0 7.0 71% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 1.00243902439 0% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 6.8 74% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 3.15609756098 158% => OK
Pronoun: 1.0 5.60731707317 18% => OK
Preposition: 31.0 33.7804878049 92% => OK
Nominalization: 0.0 3.97073170732 0% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 748.0 965.302439024 77% => OK
No of words: 150.0 196.424390244 76% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.98666666667 4.92477711251 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.49963551158 3.73543355544 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.98616067142 2.65546596893 112% => OK
Unique words: 76.0 106.607317073 71% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.506666666667 0.547539520022 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 204.3 283.868780488 72% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.45097560976 96% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 1.53170731707 0% => OK
Article: 5.0 4.33902439024 115% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.07073170732 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 0.482926829268 207% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 1.0 3.36585365854 30% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 4.0 8.94146341463 45% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 37.0 22.4926829268 164% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 71.7321406344 43.030603864 167% => OK
Chars per sentence: 187.0 112.824112599 166% => OK
Words per sentence: 37.5 22.9334400587 164% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.0 5.23603664747 95% => OK
Paragraphs: 3.0 3.83414634146 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 8.0 1.69756097561 471% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 1.0 3.70975609756 27% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.13902439024 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.09268292683 73% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.466183707468 0.215688989381 216% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.414197636566 0.103423049105 400% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.316825337309 0.0843802449381 375% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.356950001795 0.15604864568 229% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.264581018008 0.0819641961636 323% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 20.8 13.2329268293 157% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.84 61.2550243902 83% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.51609756098 48% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.4 10.3012195122 149% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.25 11.4140731707 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.79 8.06136585366 97% => OK
difficult_words: 22.0 40.7170731707 54% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 17.0 11.4329268293 149% => OK
gunning_fog: 16.8 10.9970731707 153% => OK
text_standard: 17.0 11.0658536585 154% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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More content wanted.

Rates: 61.797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.