1 A city wants to help teachers of its high school students age14 18 improve their teaching It is considering two plans 1 Choose a small group of excellent teachers these teachers will attend a class led by an expert for additional training in how to teac

Essay topics:

1. A city wants to help teachers of its high school students (age14-18) improve their teaching. It is considering two plans:
1) Choose a small group of excellent teachers; these teachers will attend a class led by an expert for additional training in how to teach effectively, and they will then come back to their schools and provide that training for other teachers in school.
2) Provide additional training in teaching effectively for high school teachers, using the online material that each teacher will study individually.
Which one do you prefer?

The quality of teachers play a significant role on the producing of talents in school education. However, in the context of China, not enough training programs have been implemented to enhance the teaching skills of frontline teachers, especially in remote areas. Thus, as for me, providing additional training course through online materials will surely contribute to the balance of education development as a whole and enhance learning efficiency of individual teacher. I feel this way for two reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
To begin with, online course makes it possible for teacher training course to reach high school teachers all over the city, which can largely promote education equality. To be specific, the status quo is that education development is extremely uneven even within one city, since most talents are attracted to some key schools which can provide more profitable jobs. Thus, teachers in those schools are likely to be known as excellent teachers and gain additional training opportunities than those in lesser-known schools, further enlarging the gap of education inequality. Thanks to technology, with online class platform such as Zoom, this problem could be largely solved. Since teachers in different schools are offered the same opportunities to take training course to upgrade their teaching skills. For instance, when English teachers in various high schools are exposed to the same advance teaching skills such as communicative language teaching, they have chance to practice such a teaching techniques in their own classroom to promote English learning of students in all high schools in the city.
Furthermore, allowing teachers to study online materials can indeed help cut the expense of school and enhance the learning efficiency. Just imagine, if high school teachers from different schools gather in one place to attend the training course, they need to stay in a hotel for several days since there are usually different separated districts in one city. Thus their school will have to pay for all the hotel expenses in addition to the train tickets, which could be a large cost for the school, especially lots of them are trying hard to cut down expenditure in recent years. Plus, it is hard for teachers to absorb all the information or techniques in such an intense training course. My personal experience can best illustrate this point. I once attended a four-week intense Celta course in the UK. In that month, I did nothing but took the class and complete all after-class homework. I felt burnt out in the second week and it was nearly impossible for me to focus during the class since I was so tired and sleep-deprived. As a result, I missed lots of essential points and had to review them after the training course by myself. Thus it will likely be the same for those teachers who took part in the intense training course. On the contrary, If they could study in their own pace in a relatively relaxing situation, they can better absorb those theories and have time to rethink and reflect them and even put them into classroom practice in the daily work.
To sum up, I support that teachers should learn online material individually for the benefits of education equality and saving the cost of school and promoting learning efficiency of teachers. (560)

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 675, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Since” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
..., this problem could be largely solved. Since teachers in different schools are offer...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 362, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...erent separated districts in one city. Thus their school will have to pay for all t...
^^^^
Line 3, column 1141, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...em after the training course by myself. Thus it will likely be the same for those te...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, furthermore, however, if, second, so, thus, as for, for instance, i feel, in addition, such as, as a result, on the contrary, to begin with, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 43.0788530466 88% => OK
Preposition: 81.0 52.1666666667 155% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 8.0752688172 223% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2781.0 1977.66487455 141% => OK
No of words: 547.0 407.700716846 134% => OK
Chars per words: 5.08409506399 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.83611736076 4.48103885553 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.69990864029 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 269.0 212.727598566 126% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.491773308958 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 853.2 618.680645161 138% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 63.9425749604 48.9658058833 131% => OK
Chars per sentence: 126.409090909 100.406767564 126% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.8636363636 20.6045352989 121% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.04545454545 5.45110844103 129% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.304222613846 0.236089414692 129% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0942296771687 0.076458572812 123% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0625045236592 0.0737576698707 85% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.187780507274 0.150856017488 124% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0599647764091 0.0645574589148 93% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.9 11.7677419355 127% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 58.1214874552 81% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 10.1575268817 125% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.48 10.9000537634 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.12 8.01818996416 101% => OK
difficult_words: 114.0 86.8835125448 131% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 10.002688172 120% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.