The following appeared in the Health section of the Greenhorne Gazette.
"Motilac is a substance that occurs naturally in the human digestive tract. Many consumers of dietary supplements containing motilac report significant easing of digestive discomfort after just a few weeks of use. Among Greenhorne residents, the consumption of motilac supplements has increased 80% over the last seven years. Last year, Greenhorne’s five hospitals reported fewer cases of serious gastrointestinal disorders than any year on record. Meanwhile, sales of motilac supplements are declining in the neighboring town of Etolin. Notably, hospitals in Etolin report a steady increase in the last two years in patients experiencing a wide range of distressing gastrointestinal symptoms. The clear explanation of these trends is that motilac is effective in preventing many serious gastrointestinal disorders."
Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.
The prompt suggests the idea that - motilac, a substance helpful for digestive tract of human, is very effective in preventing many serious gastrointestinal disorders. Although the author provided scant amount of logical reasoning, still large part of it is afflicted with logical flaws. The logical flaws in hthe assumptions of the argument are mentioned here only to be followed by sufficient clarifications.
First of all, the author believes that - the distressing gastrointestinal symptoms of Etolin residents is caused by there less exposure to motilac. But what if that is not necessarily be true? What if the residents, experiencing the distress are pretty indulged in devouring highly acidic food and consumptions even though having sufficient amount of motilac needed in their body to digest foods? One of the big reasons behind htere distressing symptoms could be there dietary habit or their daily food habit. Proper speculation might evident that people in Etolin are more susceptable to digestive distress because of some of their inherent problems in physics which might not be solved by proper use or over use of motilac. Might be the case that - the motilac actually has detoriated the health of the Etolin residents; who had been using the the substance earlier and that is why the consumption of motilac is declining in Etolin. However, neither proper evidence or statistic of previous food consumption of Etolin residents have been provided by the author and that is why the efficiancy of motilac is still debatable.
Second conjectures to consider is that - the author believes that - the easiness in digestive discomfort of Greenhorne residents is attributable to motilac. But what if the residents having digestive discomfort have cultured an exercise to make their stomach better to adapt than before? Might also be the case that the residents of Greenhorne are consuming another medicine or substance much helpful than motilac, nevertheless, without their acknowledgement. And also lack of that medicine might be attributable to the growing digestive problem of the Etolin residents. However, the author has not provided any ensurance of other complimentary food consumptions by residents of both the places and so the reasoning can not be neglected largely, making the argument of the auhtor debatable.
Thirdly, the author believes that - the decline in motilac is party attributable to the distress of the Etolin residents. But what if the opposite is true? It might also be that case that - the residents of Etolin had been used the motilac for long period of time but could not get satisfactory result and so they now tended to denounce it causing the declination of it in the market. It might also be the fact that - motilac is a kind of subsatance that can impart its effect varying from person to person. For one the effect can be soothing but for another it can be more distressing. May be because of the vulnerability of the substance to different inherent factors of human. Might also be the case that, we may not ignore - the level of motilac has been so much in the body of the residents of Etolin that further ingestion are causing them to feel more diseased and that is why they are leavning it; making the claim of the author - that more ingestion of motilac will help to prevent serious gastrointestinal disorder - faulty.
So, looking at all the points and factors aforementioned - it can be safely stated that - more evidences and supplimentary information are required to judge many debatable topics within the prompt and so devoid of answers of the questions asked in the essay - is making the conclusion of the author pretty inconcrete.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 10 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 14 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 601 350
No. of Characters: 3013 1500
No. of Different Words: 249 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.951 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.013 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.855 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 231 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 168 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 119 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 82 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.13 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.905 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.826 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.322 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.5 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.097 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 843, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
...he Etolin residents; who had been using the the substance earlier and that is why the c...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 843, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
...he Etolin residents; who had been using the the substance earlier and that is why the c...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 969, Rule ID: NEITHER_NOR[1]
Message: Use 'nor' with neither.
Suggestion: nor
...tolin. However, neither proper evidence or statistic of previous food consumption ...
^^
Line 7, column 250, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...olin had been used the motilac for long period of time but could not get satisfactory result a...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 319, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...lusion of the author pretty inconcrete.
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, however, if, look, may, nevertheless, second, so, still, third, thirdly, kind of, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 41.0 19.6327345309 209% => Less to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 12.9520958084 139% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 11.1786427146 170% => OK
Relative clauses : 23.0 13.6137724551 169% => OK
Pronoun: 39.0 28.8173652695 135% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 81.0 55.5748502994 146% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3081.0 2260.96107784 136% => OK
No of words: 601.0 441.139720559 136% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.12645590682 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.95129289623 4.56307096286 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.94221790087 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 256.0 204.123752495 125% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.425956738769 0.468620217663 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 981.9 705.55239521 139% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 75.6042326857 57.8364921388 131% => OK
Chars per sentence: 133.956521739 119.503703932 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.1304347826 23.324526521 112% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.30434782609 5.70786347227 93% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 14.0 6.88822355289 203% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.177019833563 0.218282227539 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0612605626142 0.0743258471296 82% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0585370280267 0.0701772020484 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.105154194801 0.128457276422 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0511844301315 0.0628817314937 81% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.8 14.3799401198 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 48.3550499002 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.197005988 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.77 12.5979740519 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.5 8.32208582834 102% => OK
difficult_words: 136.0 98.500998004 138% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.