Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The telephone has greater influence on people’s lives than television has.Personally, I agree with the statement that telephone has greater influence on peoples life.

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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The telephone has greater influence on people’s lives than television has.
Personally, I agree with the statement that telephone has greater influence on peoples life.

To start with, I think that telephone is good source of communication to keep in touch by speaking with friends and relatives around the world.In today's world, it is very difficult to stay without keep in touch to the friends and families around this globe especially when living in the different country than home country.consider an example , I am now living in the country USA for study purposes and I have to call my mom and dad at least one week apart.Also, I feel that without telephone it is bearly possible to me so I always willing to stay in touch with my colleague and family member speaking with phone.

In addition, telephone is a good source of visual media showing the images and photos to the people from one corner of the world to the next corner. For Example my mom and dad always want to see me in picture to know my existing physical status and for providing guidance for keep updating my physical status, which is possible with my mobile phone though I am far from them most of the time.Because of being suffered from frequent illness of common cold and allergy, my mom always like to guide me , which is possible with the mobile phone.

Finally,along with speaking and visual media, written communication has influencing people's life in this world.In today's busy world, people have to earn for their living and bringing their children.So , it is difficult to stay in connected with them all the time with the text messages from the mobile phone.Even though not having time to talk them instantly, that message can be viewed later on when having time.I do most of the time so when i need to communicate with my sister , who is doing phd from Australia in natural resource management.Also the mobile phone is the mini -store for keeping dear one's photos.

By way of conclusion, considering the points made ,speaking, visual images and photos, and written communication lead me to personally agree that that telephone has a enormous influence on people's life.Everything in the world have both positive negative part but I always prefer to it's positive part and getting advantages from it.

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I think that telephone is good source of communication
Suggestion: I think that telephone is a good source of communication

Sentence: In today's world, it is very difficult to stay without keep in touch to the friends and families around this globe especially when living in the different country than home country.
Description: The word keep is not usually used as a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: without keeping

Sentence: For Example my mom and dad always want to see me in picture to know my existing physical status and for providing guidance for keep updating my physical status, which is possible with my mobile phone though I am far from them most of the time.
Description: The token for is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: for keeping

flaws:
Don't put a space before punctuation marks.
Always put a space after punctuation marks. E-rater is sensitive.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 24 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 375 350
No. of Characters: 1709 1500
No. of Different Words: 178 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.401 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.557 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.404 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 119 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 78 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 54 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 26 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.891 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.357 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.558 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.129 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5