"Two years ago, the nearby town of Ocean View built a new municipal golf course and resort hotel. During the past two years, tourism in Ocean View has increased, new businesses have opened there, and Ocean View's tax revenues have risen by 30 percent. Therefore, the best way to improve Hopewell's economy—and generate additional tax revenues—is to build a golf course and resort hotel similar to those in Ocean View."
The argument that the revenues of Hopewell will increase by building a new golf course and resort hotel, like ocean view, is a flawed one. Because to arrive at that conclusion, the following questions have to answered: "Are people are interested in playing golf and resort hotel?", "Are there any other better ways to increase revenue?", "Even if people are interested, is there any land available to construct the golf course and resort hotel?", "Is the climate of the Hopewell is tropical or cold?.
First question implies that, Hopewell Municipality should conduct a survey to determine whether its citizens are interested in golf course and resort hotel. Because if people are indifferent to them, then it is futile to construct the golf course and resort hotel. Also, the investment will be lost, which further decreases the revenue of Hopewell.
Second one implies that, Hopewell should check whether there are any better ways to improve its revenue other than building the golf course and resort hotel. As sometimes, there can be better lucrative ways than them like building parks, theaters etc., which may generate revenues better than the golf course and resort hotel.
Thirdly, if Hopewell wants to build the golf course and resort hotel, then it has to check for the availability of land. Because, the golf course requires enormous area. If the land is not available, then they cannot build them and they have to look for other ways to increase the revenue.
Finally, if milieu of Hopewell is cold, then they cannot build the golf course. Even if they build it, it won't be profitable. Because, golf course requires somewhat tropical climate, where people can actively play the golf, and this helps in increment of the revenue.
This argument could be strengthened, if the above stated questions were answered. But, in current form, this argument is an erroneous o and a fallacious one.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
the arguments are not right on the point. Here goes a sample:
https://www.testbig.com/gmatgre-argument-task-essays/following-recommen…
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 316 350
No. of Characters: 1525 1500
No. of Different Words: 128 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.216 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.826 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.372 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 114 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 77 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 55 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 24 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.067 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.818 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.8 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.411 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.679 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.185 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 122, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Because” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... to check for the availability of land. Because, the golf course requires enormous area...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 200, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ewhat tropical climate, where people can actively play the golf, and this helps i...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, if, look, may, second, so, then, third, thirdly, well, as to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 20.0 28.8173652695 69% => OK
Preposition: 27.0 55.5748502994 49% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 6.0 16.3942115768 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1633.0 2260.96107784 72% => OK
No of words: 315.0 441.139720559 71% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.18412698413 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.21286593061 4.56307096286 92% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.61462059709 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 145.0 204.123752495 71% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.460317460317 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 502.2 705.55239521 71% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 9.0 2.70958083832 332% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 19.7664670659 76% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 81.1014179901 57.8364921388 140% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.866666667 119.503703932 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.0 23.324526521 90% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.8 5.70786347227 102% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.21822285358 0.218282227539 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.072870482148 0.0743258471296 98% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0768321669855 0.0701772020484 109% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.106802553669 0.128457276422 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0987512865295 0.0628817314937 157% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.5 14.3799401198 94% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 48.3550499002 104% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.76 12.5979740519 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.84 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 63.0 98.500998004 64% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 20.0 12.3882235529 161% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 20.0 11.9071856287 168% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 54.17 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.25 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.