TPO40 independent Some parent offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school Do you think this is a good idea?Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Essay topics:

TPO40 independent

Some parent offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school Do you think this is a good idea?

Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Submitted by schu23 on Mon, 08/20/2018 - 07:06

Never before has the problem of education been such salient as today. Since people attach great importance to education, some parents are creating new methods, e.g. giving their children money for high mark in tests, encourage them to study hard. Some people argue that it would change children’s opinion on study, making them believe that earning money is the only purpose of study. However, I think that offering children money as a reward is a favorable choice, a choice that its merits outweigh its drawbacks.

To begin with, money can be a motivation to children. Nowadays, all people need some stimulus to do their tasks passionately, among which money is one of the most direct and effective factors. When children get positive feedback of their hard work, study will be a pleasure rather than a laborious job upon which they need to devote a lot of time and effort. We cannot deny that sometimes study can be boring – doing assignments, reading passages, solving math problems, etc. If children could receive some money and use it to buy things they want as a reward, they are likely to pursue a better academic performance. For example, when I passed the entry exam to high school, my mother gave me money to buy Play Station 4, the game console I had been longing for months. It not only helps me to relax and get away from daily grind but also motivates me to study wholeheartedly in high school. So, money is a good way to keep children focused and concentrated on study.

Moreover, financial management is an important skill for career success and children can obtain it through managing their own money. By awarding money for high grades, parents can give offer their children an opportunity to learn how to spend money wisely. Though at first, they might waste it, buying expensive but useless things such as car models and dolls, gradually would they realize that it should be used in a more prudent way. Therefore, it can benefit children not only currently but also lay a solid foundation for their future career. For instance, I used to buy some merchandise and albums of my favorite singers with the money my parents gave me. Yet actually I could barely afford them, and I almost had no remaining in the end of a year. So, I started to save most of the money in bank, which has become a considerably number now.

In the final analysis, although giving money to children for grade might lead them misunderstand the meaning and goal of study, it can be solved by parents’ instruction of a healthy money attitude. Thus, I believe that it is good for parents to award children with money when they get high mark in school, because it encourages them to work hard in the short term as well as equips them with money managing skill in the long term.

Votes
Average: 8.8 (1 vote)
This essay topic by users
Post date Users Rates Link to Content
2019-12-31 Abbas.ghaffari 70 view
2019-12-17 marysv 71 view
2019-12-17 mohammadkmi 70 view
2019-10-26 M.S 2019 70 view
2019-10-17 mahbod 80 view
>>> More users practiced this topic >>>
Essay Categories
Independent TOEFL Writing

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[1]
Message: The adverb 'Never' is usually not used at the beginning of a sentence.
Never in the history has the problem of educa...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, e.g., first, however, if, moreover, so, therefore, thus, well, as to, for example, for instance, i think, such as, as well as, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 9.8082437276 173% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 53.0 43.0788530466 123% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 54.0 52.1666666667 104% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2306.0 1977.66487455 117% => OK
No of words: 489.0 407.700716846 120% => OK
Chars per words: 4.71574642127 4.8611393121 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.70248278971 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.53043997175 2.67179642975 95% => OK
Unique words: 267.0 212.727598566 126% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.546012269939 0.524837075471 104% => OK
syllable_count: 711.9 618.680645161 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.3135365356 48.9658058833 86% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.80952381 100.406767564 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.2857142857 20.6045352989 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.66666666667 5.45110844103 141% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.88709677419 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.308496913886 0.236089414692 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.091772231358 0.076458572812 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0547784245057 0.0737576698707 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.203132291651 0.150856017488 135% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.022589431518 0.0645574589148 35% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.4 11.7677419355 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.39 10.9000537634 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.1 8.01818996416 101% => OK
difficult_words: 103.0 86.8835125448 119% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 88.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 26.5 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.