Ballet is an elegant dance form which is also quite popular. In the preceding argument, the writer claim that the Pirouttes Ballet School of Elmtown is the best choice in the whole town, for any child. To bolster his claim, the author mentions that it has the most intensive program with their teachers dancing in the most prestigious ballet companies worldwide, and many of our students becoming professional dancers as well. Though the claim may have merit, the argument is based on questionable premises and assumption, lacking evidentiary support and leaves several pertinent questions unanswered for the reader. On the basis of the entire information provided, we should consider the argument as invalid.
The primary flaw in the argument is the lack of substantiated evidence. There is no mention of any proof to back the writer's claim of the Pirouttes Ballet School having the teachers danced in prestigious ballet companies worldwide or of which, or how many students becoming professional dancers as well. In addition, the demographics of the these successful dancers is not provided. Whether where they training for six months, one year, a couple of years, or more than a decade is also an important consideration to evaluate the performance of this dance school. More importantly, did these bright ones learn obtain their entire training from scratch is an essential factor. Perhaps, if these famous dancers just trained for a months over here before learning ballet for five years elsewhere, then claiming these Pirouttes is the best, is unfounded.
Moreover, the author further weakens his claim by making several unreasonable assumptions. This dance school has the most intensive program, but not all kids are willing to learn ballet from a career perspective. All children have some hobbies. Perhaps, ballet dancing is an interesting leisure activity, which has an additional benefit of learning the intricate skills of the trade as an addition. Also, most intensive schedule does not imply most learning. More often than not, a tight schedule yields poor result than a relaxed one merely due to the fact that it was too strenuous. Furthermore, if that the general environment at the school is didactic instead of creative, children are not going to be too emphatic on continuing their ballet classes in the long run.
Furthermore, there are numerous questions that the passage fails to answer. Are all the successful children of the same age-group? Do they teach all kids in same batches, or do they give special care to the younger ones, who probably require a more personal approach? If there's one learning slot for all, then perhaps, it is not the best choice for a five year old interested to learn ballet. Also, the l
In sum, the presented argument is flawed. Despite the admirable intention to recommend the best ballet dancing school for children, the writer fails to give a convincing argument. In order to improve his stand on the issue, he must largely rephrase the argument, justify his assumptions, and provide answer to pertinent questions and the concomitant implications. Without these, he is likely to influence a few readers.
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Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- not OK
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- not exactly
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 2.5 out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 27 15
No. of Words: 515 350
No. of Characters: 2581 1500
No. of Different Words: 260 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.764 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.012 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.667 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 203 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 153 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 104 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 58 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.074 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.541 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.519 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.257 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.439 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.066 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 192, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...let School having the teachers danced in prestigious ballet companies worldwide o...
^^
Line 3, column 611, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to obtain'
Suggestion: to obtain
...mportantly, did these bright ones learn obtain their entire training from scratch is a...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Two successive sentences begin with the same adverb. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...heir ballet classes in the long run. Furthermore, there are numerous questions that the ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 272, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: there's
...ly require a more personal approach? If theres one learning slot for all, then perhaps...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, furthermore, if, may, moreover, so, then, well, as to, in addition
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.6327345309 112% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 12.9520958084 23% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 29.0 28.8173652695 101% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 55.5748502994 92% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 16.3942115768 110% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2657.0 2260.96107784 118% => OK
No of words: 515.0 441.139720559 117% => OK
Chars per words: 5.15922330097 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.763781212 4.56307096286 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76789561071 2.78398813304 99% => OK
Unique words: 268.0 204.123752495 131% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.520388349515 0.468620217663 111% => OK
syllable_count: 805.5 705.55239521 114% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 6.0 1.67365269461 358% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 8.0 4.22255489022 189% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 19.7664670659 132% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 55.6964511846 57.8364921388 96% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.192307692 119.503703932 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.8076923077 23.324526521 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.96153846154 5.70786347227 52% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 8.20758483034 183% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.357660163847 0.218282227539 164% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.087677307232 0.0743258471296 118% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.100788833665 0.0701772020484 144% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.190581238095 0.128457276422 148% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0918356975382 0.0628817314937 146% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.8 14.3799401198 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.3550499002 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.65 12.5979740519 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.66 8.32208582834 104% => OK
difficult_words: 133.0 98.500998004 135% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.