Technology changed our life in different areas. Kids are more dependent to different technology advancement nowadays. While some believe this change are positive for students and childeren to get along with this new world, others against it. In my opinion, playing with simpler toys and outside is more beneficial for them due to their need to grow healthy and learn how to modify their action in different situation.
First of all, kids need to move to grow healthy. In other words, without engaging in simpler playing and going outside they do not grow normally. In other words, these playing help them to learn the usage of fine and difficult muscle movement which is necessary for their normal growth. Also, they provide them an environment to have fun with nature and simple life. They learn for having happiness there is no need to have lots of money and fortune. For example, being friendly with plant and animals and playing with ball which is present everywhere provide them joy and happiness even more than technology. In addition, these activities help kids to increase their serotonin level and growth hormon which is crucial for their mental and physical health. Research showed that seeing more obesity and deppression and anxiety between kids are product of this modernize life. Kids are experiencing more sedentary life due to technology which harms their body and mental health. So, involving in playing outside with simpler tool is essential for their normal growth.
Moreover, kids learn and develop by interaction in different situation. In fact, they learn how to reacted to different situation by being in that position. By playing with simple toy and engaging in group playing, they learn and touch how to react and how to behave in different situation. For instance, they learn there is win and fail in every game and they have to play fair unless they lose their friend. Studies showed that kids without interaction with other kids in different situation, are less capable of having a successful life in the future. Therefore, communication and interaction in real world situation is very important for their adaptation and building social skills. Kids with less interaction with other kids do not learn how to behave. In other words, they have deficiency in social behavior, so become more isolated. Therefore, they will suffer in the future. Thus, kids need interaction to develop normally.
In conclusion, although knowing about the use of technology is very helpful and can help the kids to know how to use them properly from the young age, too much dependence on these devices has drawbacks. Kids in young age need physical activity for their growth and development. Physical activities and engaging in simpler plays, not only help the kids to grow healtier in their mind and their body, but they are also useful for their decision making in the future and better communication skills and better life.
- TPO-49 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?The ability to maintain friendships with a small number of people over a long period of time is more important for happiness than the ability to make many new friends 60
- In 1912 a bookseller named Wilfrid M. Voynich acquired a beautifully illustrated handwritten book (manuscript) written on vellum (vellum is a material that was used for writing before the introduction of paper). The "Voynich manuscript," as it became kno 3
- TPO-48 - Integrated Writing Task In recent years, many frog species around the world have declined in numbers or even gone extinct due to changes in their environment. These population declines and extinctions have serious consequences for the ecosystems 85
- Professors are normally found in university classrooms, offices, and libraries doing research and lecturing to their students. More and more, however, they also appear as guests on television news programs, giving expert commentary on the latest events in 70
- Young people enjoy life more than older people do. 60
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
Technology changed our life in different...
^^^
Line 6, column 542, Rule ID: EVERY_WHERE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'everywhere'?
Suggestion: everywhere
... and playing with ball which is present every where provide them joy and happiness even mor...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 392, Rule ID: LOOSE_LOSE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'lose' (= miss, waste, suffer the loss etc.)?
Suggestion: lose
... and they have to play fair unless they loose their friend. Studies showed that kids ...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, moreover, so, therefore, thus, while, for example, for instance, in addition, in conclusion, in fact, first of all, in my opinion, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 30.0 13.8261648746 217% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 41.0 43.0788530466 95% => OK
Preposition: 76.0 52.1666666667 146% => OK
Nominalization: 22.0 8.0752688172 272% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2462.0 1977.66487455 124% => OK
No of words: 486.0 407.700716846 119% => OK
Chars per words: 5.0658436214 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.69525374022 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.4963088129 2.67179642975 93% => OK
Unique words: 219.0 212.727598566 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.450617283951 0.524837075471 86% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 742.5 618.680645161 120% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.6003584229 131% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.6377793846 48.9658058833 97% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.1851851852 100.406767564 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.0 20.6045352989 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.18518518519 5.45110844103 113% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.211415570518 0.236089414692 90% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0612951383741 0.076458572812 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0558760282242 0.0737576698707 76% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.133766186847 0.150856017488 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0263394357549 0.0645574589148 41% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.4 11.7677419355 97% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 58.1214874552 106% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.83 10.9000537634 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.39 8.01818996416 92% => OK
difficult_words: 88.0 86.8835125448 101% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.002688172 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 71.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.