The behavior pattern of people and the attitude towards risks could have a significant influence on their success. Some people argue that a man who is cautious and careful is of a better chance of success. Nevertheless, from my perspective, one should be courageous enough to take risks if he or she wishes to succeed.
On the one hand, one factor of success - creativity - is highly related to taking risks. Significant progress in any field requires innovation and creativity to make a substantial change. To create something new is highly risky as no one can foresee the effect of the invention. For instance, when Apple company first introduce the conception of the App Store, the risk of such design is unmeasurable. Although the notion sounded attracting - a smartphone with the App Store could be embedded with functions that could only be achieved by computers, there was no App developed. However, Apple decided to invest heavily in that program, and its success is apparent as an era of the smartphone is lead by Apple, and the company gained many profits from it.
On the other hand, cautiousness and carefulness could merely reduce the chance of making mistakes instead of achieving colossal success. For example, a bank clerk could be super patient and careful of his or her daily work, which keeps helping the clerk away from trouble form messing up. However, the chances are low that a considerable promotion will occur to him or her by merely avoiding mistakes because managers require other qualities such as skills of communication and the ability to extend potential customer groups. Only by staying away from errors could hardly show the supervisor his or her abilities.
Besides, in the field of Finance, profits are explained as the make-up for bearing risks. In other words, if there is no risk, there is no gain as well. The courage of taking risks could create value in the eye of Fiance.
In summary, people should be more willing to take reasonable risks instead of being way too cautious about achieving something big because the courage to take risks is the requirement of creativity and cautiousness and carefulness could lead to correct result instead of enormous success.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion:
... risks if he or she wishes to succeed. On the one hand, one factor of success -...
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Suggestion:
...e company gained many profits from it. On the other hand, cautiousness and care...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...w the supervisor his or her abilities. Besides, in the field of Finance, profit...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...uld create value in the eye of Fiance. In summary, people should be more willin...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, first, however, if, nevertheless, so, well, for example, for instance, in summary, such as, in other words, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 16.0 43.0788530466 37% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 52.1666666667 98% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1845.0 1977.66487455 93% => OK
No of words: 368.0 407.700716846 90% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.01358695652 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.37987740619 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72463944427 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 196.0 212.727598566 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.532608695652 0.524837075471 101% => OK
syllable_count: 573.3 618.680645161 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 9.59856630824 0% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 59.219490853 48.9658058833 121% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.529411765 100.406767564 108% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.6470588235 20.6045352989 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.88235294118 5.45110844103 145% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.144869306053 0.236089414692 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0457049176919 0.076458572812 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.049076977283 0.0737576698707 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0926812529512 0.150856017488 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0607480933918 0.0645574589148 94% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 11.7677419355 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 58.1214874552 86% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.78 10.9000537634 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.58 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 91.0 86.8835125448 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.