All through the development of human civilization there has been a constant tussle between cooperation and competition as philosophies of guidance for our youth. Many believe that the best way to develop thoughtful leaders in government, industry, or other fields, is by having young people compete. However, this notion is misguided due to the following reasons.
Many argue that a sense of competition can be used as a powerful motivator to generate ideas that may not have been generated otherwise. However, there is a vast body of research that proves this is not the case and that a sense of cooperation is a better motivator for leaders. Consider the case of Netflix, a streaming service usually considered to be the best in the market. Reed Hastings, their CEO, is rated as one of the best and Netflix maintains a significant lead compared to all of their competitors. Hastings has an open door policy and there is zero tolerance for refusal of cooperation which is usually linked to their high ratings.
Another benefit usually associated with competition between peers is that it weeds out the weak and rewards the high performers. While this may be true, such behavior is often associated with toxic work environments and there is a significant drop in employee morale. A good example of this can be seen in the Microsoft corporate structure under Steve Ballmer. Ballmer often had people compete and many departments became uncooperative to make sure their ideas are protected to make sure they get promoted. This led to frequent infighting and led to a brain drain which reverses the gains caused by competition. Consequently Microsoft was on the verge of collapse. However, their new CEO Satya Nadella has the opposite philosophy that lead to a huge increase in morale and productivity.
Finally, competition between the youth leads to high stress and anxiety among employees which may lead to faster burnout. As it can be seen, competition often leads to frequent infighting, brain drain and toxic workplaces. Looking at these reasons it can be concluded that a sense of cooperation is the best way for a society to prepare its young for leadership in government, industry and other fields.
- Teachers' salaries should be based on their students' academic performance. 66
- "The following is taken from a memo from the advertising director of the Super Screen Movie Production Company. "According to a recent report from our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended Super Screen-produced movies 34
- All parents should be required to volunteer time to their children's schools.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling 54
- There is little justification for society to make extraordinary efforts—especially at a great cost in money and jobs—to save endangered animal or plant species.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the st 66
- "The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition." - Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or dis 50
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 334, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...mpete. However, this notion is misguided due to the following reasons. Many ar...
^^
Line 5, column 370, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[10]
Message: The adverb 'often' is usually put between 'had' and 'people'.
Suggestion: had often people
... structure under Steve Ballmer. Ballmer often had people compete and many departments became unc...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 613, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Consequently,
...verses the gains caused by competition. Consequently Microsoft was on the verge of collapse....
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, finally, however, if, look, may, so, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.5258426966 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.4196629213 56% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 14.8657303371 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.3162921348 97% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 33.0505617978 76% => OK
Preposition: 47.0 58.6224719101 80% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 12.9106741573 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1848.0 2235.4752809 83% => OK
No of words: 365.0 442.535393258 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.06301369863 5.05705443957 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.37092360658 4.55969084622 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.89007204401 2.79657885939 103% => OK
Unique words: 194.0 215.323595506 90% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.531506849315 0.4932671777 108% => OK
syllable_count: 580.5 704.065955056 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 6.24550561798 64% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.99550561798 40% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.38483146067 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.2370786517 89% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 23.0359550562 87% => OK
Sentence length SD: 30.9784871591 60.3974514979 51% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 102.666666667 118.986275619 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.2777777778 23.4991977007 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.11111111111 5.21951772744 60% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 7.80617977528 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 10.2758426966 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 5.13820224719 39% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.83258426966 62% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.163347846804 0.243740707755 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0477670774826 0.0831039109588 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0745158578207 0.0758088955206 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.110997035612 0.150359130593 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0596645554928 0.0667264976115 89% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.5 14.1392134831 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 48.8420337079 105% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.1743820225 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.07 12.1639044944 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.78 8.38706741573 105% => OK
difficult_words: 96.0 100.480337079 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 11.8971910112 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.2143820225 89% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.