The following appeared in a memo from the marketing director of Top Dog Pet Stores.
"Five years ago Fish Emporium started advertising in the magazine Exotic Pets Monthly. Their stores saw sales increase by 15 percent after their ads began appearing in the magazine. The three Fish Emporium stores in Gulf City saw an even greater increase than that. Because Top Dog Pet Stores is based in Gulf City, it seems clear that we should start placing our own ads in Exotic Pets Monthly. If we do so, we will be sure to reverse the recent trend of declining sales and start making a profit again."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
While it may be true that by advertising in the magazine exotic pets monthly there may be sure to reverse the recent trend of declining sales and start making a profit again. this argument does not make a cogent case for advertising in magazine exotic pets monthly. it is easy to understand why top dog wants to advertise in magazine exotic pets monthly. But, this argument is rife with holes and assumption, and thus, does not strong enough to make author's assumption cogent. I think there may be some hidden factors that may prove the author's assumption invalid. Hence the argument is incomplete.
First of all, the argument readily assumes that Five years ago, fish emporium started advertising in magazine exotic pets monthly and by advertising their stores saw sales increased by 15 percent. this is merely an assumption made without much solid ground. For e.g., it may be possible that advertising in exotic pets monthly is only one of the factor that led to increase in sales. there may be some other factors including advertising such as stores may have eclectic collection of fish that have captured customer’s interest towards it or they may have cheaper price compared to other stores. furthermore, the director just mentions a 15 percent rise and no other figure. it is probable that 15 percent is not a noticeable change if the sales of the past period are low. if any of these assumptions turn true the conclusion of the author renders void.
Second, the argument states here that the three fish emporium stores in gulf city saw an even greater increase in sales than top dog stores. because top dog has some stores in gulf city. this again is a weak and unsupported claim as it does not demonstrate any clear correlation between advertising in exotic pets monthly and increase in sales. Moreover, author did not provide any statistical information from how much percent sales increased compared to fish emporium. it may possible that sales in three fish emporium in only slightly higher compared to fish emporium. it may equally possible that gulf city citizens are more inclined into fish compared to other animals as pet. furthermore, just because the pet store is based in gulf city does not mean that people like dogs or maybe they do not have proper facilities, time, space and financial resources to adopt dog. if the argument provided more evidence on percent change and on liking of gulf city people towards fish then it would have been a lot more convincing to the reader.
Finally, the author claims that it seems clear that if top dog starts placing its own ads in exotic pets monthly there will be sure to reverse trend of declining sales and start making profit again. However, careful scrutiny of the evidence reveals that it provide little credible support for the author's conclusion in several critical respects such as what works for fish emporium will definitely work for top dog or it may equally possible that price in top dog store is much higher than fish emporium. Therefore, people prefer to go to fish emporium rather than going to top dog. All of these assumptions could be likely and must be taken into consideration by the director.
In conclusion, the author's argument is unpersuasive as it stands. The writer require to provide sufficient data and reliable statistics about the sales and operations of the fish emporium store and overall appraisal of the performance of dog store and careful investigation of the market trend in order to make his conclusion rational.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 598 350
No. of Characters: 2871 1500
No. of Different Words: 247 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.945 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.801 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.516 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 201 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 149 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 104 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 49 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 37.375 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 25.037 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.875 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.355 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.58 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.093 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 176, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
... sales and start making a profit again. this argument does not make a cogent case fo...
^^^^
Line 1, column 267, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...tising in magazine exotic pets monthly. it is easy to understand why top dog wants...
^^
Line 1, column 538, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
... some hidden factors that may prove the authors assumption invalid. Hence the argument ...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 566, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...y prove the authors assumption invalid. Hence the argument is incomplete. Fir...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 198, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
...ores saw sales increased by 15 percent. this is merely an assumption made without mu...
^^^^
Line 7, column 385, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
...e factor that led to increase in sales. there may be some other factors including adv...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 603, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Furthermore
...cheaper price compared to other stores. furthermore, the director just mentions a 15 percen...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 682, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
... a 15 percent rise and no other figure. it is probable that 15 percent is not a no...
^^
Line 7, column 781, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
...f the sales of the past period are low. if any of these assumptions turn true the ...
^^
Line 7, column 781, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “if” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...f the sales of the past period are low. if any of these assumptions turn true the ...
^^
Line 13, column 142, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Because
... increase in sales than top dog stores. because top dog has some stores in gulf city. t...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 142, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “because” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... increase in sales than top dog stores. because top dog has some stores in gulf city. t...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 188, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
...e top dog has some stores in gulf city. this again is a weak and unsupported claim a...
^^^^
Line 13, column 472, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...es increased compared to fish emporium. it may possible that sales in three fish e...
^^
Line 13, column 573, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...ghtly higher compared to fish emporium. it may equally possible that gulf city cit...
^^
Line 13, column 683, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Furthermore
... fish compared to other animals as pet. furthermore, just because the pet store is based in...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 876, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
...e and financial resources to adopt dog. if the argument provided more evidence on ...
^^
Line 19, column 298, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...provide little credible support for the authors conclusion in several critical respects...
^^^^^^^
Line 25, column 20, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...he director. In conclusion, the authors argument is unpersuasive as it stands. ...
^^^^^^^
Line 25, column 86, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'providing'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'require' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: providing
...uasive as it stands. The writer require to provide sufficient data and reliable statistics...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, e.g., finally, first, furthermore, hence, however, if, may, moreover, second, so, then, therefore, thus, while, i think, in conclusion, such as, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.6327345309 112% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 11.1786427146 161% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 13.6137724551 110% => OK
Pronoun: 40.0 28.8173652695 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 66.0 55.5748502994 119% => OK
Nominalization: 19.0 16.3942115768 116% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2959.0 2260.96107784 131% => OK
No of words: 597.0 441.139720559 135% => OK
Chars per words: 4.95644891122 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.94303383012 4.56307096286 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.58142268124 2.78398813304 93% => OK
Unique words: 256.0 204.123752495 125% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.428810720268 0.468620217663 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 934.2 705.55239521 132% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 4.96107784431 202% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 19.7664670659 137% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 65.8329556691 57.8364921388 114% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.592592593 119.503703932 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.1111111111 23.324526521 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.0 5.70786347227 105% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 20.0 5.25449101796 381% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.20758483034 171% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.34338159997 0.218282227539 157% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0993649099625 0.0743258471296 134% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0922899390815 0.0701772020484 132% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.193525536317 0.128457276422 151% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0571725543238 0.0628817314937 91% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 14.3799401198 90% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.49 12.5979740519 91% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.64 8.32208582834 92% => OK
difficult_words: 110.0 98.500998004 112% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.