Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?
In modern days, the society is extremely competitive. This competition started since students attend schools, a place that creates exams and grades to judge a student’s performance by numbers. Therefore, it’s not surprising that in order to improve their children’s grades, parents give money to children as a reward. The motivation behind this action might be good, however, in my opinion, offering children money when they achieve high grades can cause severe influences in children’s long-term development. My claim will be elaborated further in the following paragraph.
First, despite the fact that money is a good motivation for kids to study indeed, it actually brings negative influences on how children view money because it encourages children to learn for money and reward rather than to learn for themselves. Take my classmate as an example, it is his parents’ idea to offer him money when he scores over 90 in tests that make him cheat during exams. Although he hasn’t been caught even once, the habit of only learning for reward will certainly make him harder to succeed in the future.
Adding on the previous claim, giving children money based on their academic performance oversimplifies the process of how money is earned in the real world. When children think that it’s easy to earn money, they tend to spend it without limits, which can certainly be an issue because they can not manage their own money properly.
Second, as a student who didn’t receive any money in the past, not connecting learning and money together makes me focus more on the process of learning itself rather than the final grade. Surprisingly, I found out that not having to worry about other things but the test itself often makes me score a higher grade compared to those students who receive money if they pass the test.
In conclusion, the reason parents offer money to their children based on scores is understandable, but the potential consequences of leading children to have incorrect values and habits on money cannot be ignored. Therefore, I strongly believe that students should not get money when they get high scores in tests.
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| 2023-06-27 | YasamanEsml | 76 | view |
| 2023-03-16 | sonyeoso | 76 | view |
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| 2023-02-11 | reza_fattahi | 90 | view |
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, first, however, if, second, so, therefore, in conclusion, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 13.8261648746 43% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 41.0 43.0788530466 95% => OK
Preposition: 46.0 52.1666666667 88% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1808.0 1977.66487455 91% => OK
No of words: 354.0 407.700716846 87% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.10734463277 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.33761313653 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65793240685 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 200.0 212.727598566 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.564971751412 0.524837075471 108% => OK
syllable_count: 539.1 618.680645161 87% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.6003584229 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 25.0 20.1344086022 124% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 52.8770232884 48.9658058833 108% => OK
Chars per sentence: 129.142857143 100.406767564 129% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.2857142857 20.6045352989 123% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.14285714286 5.45110844103 113% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.294394681734 0.236089414692 125% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.101870629233 0.076458572812 133% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0670978176506 0.0737576698707 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.170466010467 0.150856017488 113% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0521670774086 0.0645574589148 81% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.3 11.7677419355 130% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 54.56 58.1214874552 94% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.65 10.9000537634 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.27 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 76.0 86.8835125448 87% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.0537634409 119% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 80.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.