The following appeared in a memo from the owner of a chain of cheese stores located throughout the United States.
"For many years all the stores in our chain have stocked a wide variety of both domestic and imported cheeses. Last year, however, all of the five best-selling cheeses at our newest store were domestic cheddar cheeses from Wisconsin. Furthermore, a recent survey by Cheeses of the World magazine indicates an increasing preference for domestic cheeses among its subscribers. Since our company can reduce expenses by limiting inventory, the best way to improve profits in all of our stores is to discontinue stocking many of our varieties of imported cheese and concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The prompt suggests the idea of the owner to discontinue the stocking of various forms of chesse and encourage only to concentrate on the domestic ones. Though the onwer shared important logical reasoning, there are certain logical flaws in the premises of the argument; which are here to be mentioned only to be followed by sufficient clarifications.
To begin with - the author referenced - that their "best-selling cheese" chesse for the last year was the five types of domestic cheddar chesses, in order to solidify his idea to concentrate more on the domestic chesses. His assumption comes only through the invocation in the World Magazine about the rise in preference of the domestic chesses among the subscribers. Not showing any acumen, he has taken the idea for granted. However, what is the evidence that the World Magazine has not published the preference for their own advantages? It might be the case that the magazine has been paid hugely by the domestic chesse seller for referencing their advertisement which might help their moribund business to rise up again. We can not dissolute the possibility that the domestic cheesses might no be the topmost ones in the preference charts of the retail consumers and that is why the seller of the domestic ones might take some shrewed steps to take the attention of the consumers who buy those chesses from them. If that is the case then the idea of the owner might not hold any truth.
The second to come with is that - that there last year all five best selling were the domestic chesses from Wisconsin - can not ensure that the preferences of the customeres in the coming times will be the same. It might be the case that - in the previous year they had been bored with the domestic chesse and that is why this year (the following one) the demand of the imported ones become high. Now, only concentrating on the domestic chesses might cause the business of the owner to fall when there will be rise in the demand of imported chesses; as relatively less concentration might waste those chesses, providing that there will be sahrp increase in the demand of foreign chesses. Good way to predict some part of the idea is to go by statistics and history. If the owner goes through the previous three or five years or more history or any typoe of statistics of the demand of the chesses in his region, he will get some good idea how the demands of his customers are changing. From that idea he could implement some measures in his decision. However, no evidence of previous records or any sort of statistics has been provided in the prompt; only making coming to a concrete decision harder.
Another conjecture of the owner is that - only by concentrating on the domestic chesse will begets him more profits in coming days. The irony is that he is missing some good balance in his idea. Even it is assumed that there will be surge in the deman of the domestic chesse, then what is the guarantee that ther customers will only buy those chesses from their stocks? What if the competition among the stocks of the domestic chesse becomes very high that they lag behind although recording top-five best selling in their earlier times? Would it not be better to maintain a balance between the domestic and the foreign chesses? Probably yes. Might be the case that all the stocks will follow the same reasoning of the owner and so they might replenish all the imported chese from their stocks. But the owner's one might make huge profit from only selling the imported chesses that they retained in their store, providng that the surge happens in the foreign chesse, not for the domestic ones.
So, looking at all the points and resoning menioted earlier it might not be a good idea to come to a conclusion; based on numerous logical and critical flaws. That is why sufficient evidences with answering the questiones asked in the essay might help the owner to come to a better conclusion than earlier.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 9 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 18 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 687 350
No. of Characters: 3199 1500
No. of Different Words: 265 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.12 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.656 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.419 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 203 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 159 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 107 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 53 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.423 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.58 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.423 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.332 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.492 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.143 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 806, Rule ID: NOW[3]
Message: Did you mean 'now' (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
Suggestion: now
...bility that the domestic cheesses might no be the topmost ones in the preference c...
^^
Line 3, column 1028, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...sumers who buy those chesses from them. If that is the case then the idea of the o...
^^
Line 7, column 93, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'beget'
Suggestion: beget
...ncentrating on the domestic chesse will begets him more profits in coming days. The ir...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, look, second, so, then, sort of, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 32.0 19.6327345309 163% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 25.0 12.9520958084 193% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 26.0 13.6137724551 191% => OK
Pronoun: 56.0 28.8173652695 194% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 92.0 55.5748502994 166% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3274.0 2260.96107784 145% => OK
No of words: 687.0 441.139720559 156% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.76564774381 5.12650576532 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.11963717896 4.56307096286 112% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.53437231803 2.78398813304 91% => OK
Unique words: 273.0 204.123752495 134% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.397379912664 0.468620217663 85% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1018.8 705.55239521 144% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 22.8473053892 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 68.2706608734 57.8364921388 118% => OK
Chars per sentence: 130.96 119.503703932 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.48 23.324526521 118% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.56 5.70786347227 45% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 8.20758483034 183% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.164283969709 0.218282227539 75% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0510193465878 0.0743258471296 69% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0472175760503 0.0701772020484 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0953776055885 0.128457276422 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0394966119409 0.0628817314937 63% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.8 14.3799401198 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 48.3550499002 109% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 12.197005988 103% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.68 12.5979740519 85% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.92 8.32208582834 95% => OK
difficult_words: 128.0 98.500998004 130% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.1389221557 115% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.