"An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Clearly, eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, we recommend the daily the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil , as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism." Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument.
A memo that appeared in the newsletter of West Meria public health council
argued that an innovative treatment which included nutritional supplement
derived from fish oil was found for common cold which is assumed to be the
main reason for absenteeism at schools and workplaces. This argument is rife
with flaws as it stands.
Firstly, a study in the nearby east Meria is taken into consideration where
high fish consumption is being related to low doctor visits by patients for
colds every year. This is not the case because although fish contain a lot
of important vitamins and minerals they however are in no way related with
the disease of common colds. Moreover, if we assume that fish do help with
common colds in some way there is no guarantee that absenteeism will go down
if people start eating fish regularly.
Further, it can be said that the reasons for absenteeism in schools can be
due to its curriculum and due to lack of interest in students for learning.
Instead, the schools must take steps to inspire and motivate its students
towards learning and the issue can be resolved. At workplaces people can
have serious reasons for absenteeism and it cannot be related with having
colds in the first place.
Though colds are the most common reason given for absence the council
should try reading between the lines and realize that people use colds
as an excuse because it is the most easily believable and simple reason.
Also, the use of nutritional supplements doesn't directly target common colds,
rather taking precautions during changing weathers, protecting one self with
warm clothes, maintaining proper hygiene can be the steps to counter common
colds assuming that they are one of the reasons foe high absenteeism.
Since, this argument contains too many flaws it doesn't support the council's
decision in any way and should be reevaluated.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
---|---|---|---|
2023-08-14 | Anil2044 | 62 | view |
2023-06-07 | kalp98403 | 53 | view |
2023-05-31 | userxyz110 | 58 | view |
2023-03-24 | Voja Kar | 58 | view |
2023-02-13 | Yam Kumar Oli | 75 | view |
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 11 15
No. of Words: 314 350
No. of Characters: 1524 1500
No. of Different Words: 176 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.21 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.854 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.511 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 114 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 80 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 48 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 26 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.545 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.517 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.455 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.37 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.696 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.094 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 74, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...nt which included nutritional supplement derived from fish oil was found for comm...
^^^
Line 3, column 75, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...r common cold which is assumed to be the main reason for absenteeism at schools a...
^^^
Line 4, column 77, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ls and workplaces. This argument is rife with flaws as it stands. Firstly, a s...
^^^
Line 7, column 76, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... Meria is taken into consideration where high fish consumption is being related t...
^^^
Line 8, column 76, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ted to low doctor visits by patients for colds every year. This is not the case b...
^^^
Line 10, column 75, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... they however are in no way related with the disease of common colds. Moreover, i...
^^^
Line 12, column 77, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... guarantee that absenteeism will go down if people start eating fish regularly. ...
^^^
Line 15, column 75, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...easons for absenteeism in schools can be due to its curriculum and due to lack of...
^^^
Line 17, column 74, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...eps to inspire and motivate its students towards learning and the issue can be re...
^^^
Line 18, column 73, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...an be resolved. At workplaces people can have serious reasons for absenteeism and...
^^^
Line 19, column 74, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ism and it cannot be related with having colds in the first place. Though col...
^^^
Line 22, column 70, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...mon reason given for absence the council should try reading between the lines and...
^^^
Line 23, column 71, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... lines and realize that people use colds as an excuse because it is the most easi...
^^^
Line 25, column 42, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...lso, the use of nutritional supplements doesnt directly target common colds, rather t...
^^^^^^
Line 28, column 41, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'reasons'' or 'reason's'?
Suggestion: reasons'; reason's
...colds assuming that they are one of the reasons foe high absenteeism. Since, this ar...
^^^^^^^
Line 30, column 49, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...his argument contains too many flaws it doesnt support the councils decision in any ...
^^^^^^
Line 30, column 76, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...any flaws it doesnt support the councils decision in any way and should be reeval...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, firstly, however, if, moreover, so, in the first place
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 20.0 28.8173652695 69% => OK
Preposition: 33.0 55.5748502994 59% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 7.0 16.3942115768 43% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1605.0 2260.96107784 71% => OK
No of words: 312.0 441.139720559 71% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.14423076923 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.20279927342 4.56307096286 92% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.56334724452 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 178.0 204.123752495 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.570512820513 0.468620217663 122% => OK
syllable_count: 460.8 705.55239521 65% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 19.7664670659 56% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 22.8473053892 123% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 70.0987497088 57.8364921388 121% => OK
Chars per sentence: 145.909090909 119.503703932 122% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.3636363636 23.324526521 122% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.09090909091 5.70786347227 107% => OK
Paragraphs: 27.0 5.15768463074 523% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 17.0 5.25449101796 324% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.67664670659 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.136738136656 0.218282227539 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0563232672815 0.0743258471296 76% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0655212439216 0.0701772020484 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0376932634946 0.128457276422 29% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0478624672242 0.0628817314937 76% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.0 14.3799401198 118% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.52 48.3550499002 107% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 12.197005988 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.83 12.5979740519 102% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.57 8.32208582834 103% => OK
difficult_words: 70.0 98.500998004 71% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 11.1389221557 119% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.