hobco hobby shop

Essay topics:

hobco hobby shop

In the above memo, the author contends that the HobCo, Inc. should choose Grilldon as the site for next shop to be opened. The claim seems to be plausible in certain cases. But careful scrutiny reveals that it lack solid evidence and is based on incomplete assumptions making the claim unconvincing. So numerous questions need to be answered to varify the author's claim.

First, The author assumes that the result of the poll of Grilldon residents can reflect the actual action of the residents. However, the propensity of paticipants' response in a poll does not necessarily warrant the actual action of the participants. It is possible that they don't buy products in reality even if they respond that they welcome the hobby shop. Thus the question regarding to the residents' actual consumption pattern need to be answered.

Second, the author assumes that the increasing trend for the past decades can be equally applicable to predict future trend. However, the trend of the past period does not guarantee the future trend. The demand and popularity might be changed from now on. Therefore, the authors need to answer whether the trend of popularity in the future is the same as that for the past decades.

Third, the author assumes that the hobby shop can meet the demand of consumer in Grilldon. But there is nothing to show the kind of product which is sold in this hobby shop. Even if the Grilldon have a lot of demands in the product for hobby, it is possible that the Hobco hobby shop sells the products which are not prefered in this region. Especially, because this region has a large population of retirees, the hobby shop might not be used unless sells the product for the retirees. As such, the questions pertaining that the hobby shop can make the residents satisfied with their products need to be answered.

In sum, the argument is not well supported and based on incomplete assumptions. So the author has to answer the questiones mentioned in this essay to varify the claim.

Votes
Average: 5 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 276, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
... participants. It is possible that they dont buy products in reality even if they re...
^^^^
Line 3, column 360, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...spond that they welcome the hobby shop. Thus the question regarding to the residents...
^^^^
Line 7, column 81, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... shop can meet the demand of consumer in Grilldon. But there is nothing to show t...
^^
Line 7, column 169, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d of product which is sold in this hobby shop. Even if the Grilldon have a lot of...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, regarding, second, so, therefore, third, thus, well, as to, kind of

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 19.6327345309 81% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 11.1786427146 45% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 21.0 28.8173652695 73% => OK
Preposition: 44.0 55.5748502994 79% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 16.3942115768 30% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1663.0 2260.96107784 74% => OK
No of words: 342.0 441.139720559 78% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.86257309942 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.30037696126 4.56307096286 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.52626333333 2.78398813304 91% => OK
Unique words: 157.0 204.123752495 77% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.459064327485 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 501.3 705.55239521 71% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.471057884232 0% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.76447105788 137% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 32.0038669539 57.8364921388 55% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 83.15 119.503703932 70% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.1 23.324526521 73% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.6 5.70786347227 81% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.258078551193 0.218282227539 118% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0774582491034 0.0743258471296 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.10139352862 0.0701772020484 144% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.117163802642 0.128457276422 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.147277096632 0.0628817314937 234% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.0 14.3799401198 70% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 48.3550499002 130% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 12.197005988 71% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.61 12.5979740519 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.13 8.32208582834 98% => OK
difficult_words: 79.0 98.500998004 80% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 12.3882235529 52% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.