An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be paid subsidies for farming the new variety of millet. Since millet is already a staple food in Tagus, people will readily adopt the new variety. To combat vitamin A deficiency, the government of Tagus should do everything it can to promote this new type of millet.
In the impoverished nation of Tagus, the government is attempting to address a serious public health issue; the people of Tagus are suffering from a widescale vitamin A deficiency. In response, the Tagus government decided that engineering a new breed of millet high in vitamin A will solve the problem. However, Tagus doesn't support many of the claims it makes in justifying the production of this millet. For example, do the people of Tagus want this millet or are there enough people to justify producing this millet, will the farmers truly be compensated fairly, and are there other, cheaper alternatives?
First, the Tagus government did not address whether the citizens were well informed of the new vitamin A-enriched millet and whether there are enough people who need this alternative crop. The citizens of Tagus likely see issues with immunity and poor vision and hearing due to the deficiency, but the government needs to note that there is indeed a need for this product. How many people are affected by the deficiency? Good support to address these questions would include surveys of the Tagus people, perhaps conducted by medical facilities. Interviews with citizenry would also help capture the scope of the issue and provide anecdotal insight.
Second, if the government can't confirm that X number of people out of the population suffering from vitamin A deficiency, then Tagus can't determine if the subsidies will sustain farmers. By promoting the millet and stating that farmers won't need to worry so much about paying for the pricier seeds, the government presumes that people will want the crop; the sales will be there. Once confirming if the population desperately needs this new millet, then a cost analysis must be conducted. For X people of the population pays for Y tons of millet each year, the government will subsidize $Z to the vitamin-A millet farmers of Tagus. This will ensure that farmers are effectively compensated, all while tracking the consumption of the millet.
Lastly, if engineering these new seeds is more costly and will cost farmers more upfront, it might be more reasonable for Tagus to seek other produce to prioritize. For example, carrots and tomatoes are relatively rich in vitamin A and are relatively cheap to grow. If the need is there and the cost of these vegetables is lower, there may not be a need for Tagus to subsidize farmers or at least have fewer subsidies to pay out. If alternatives rich in vitamin A were considered, it would be useful to understand why they were ruled out in order to prioritize this new millet.
In conclusion, the nation of Tagus fell short on its rationale as to why it should promote a vitamin A-rich millet. The government did not address the need for this millet in full scope, it did not provide insight on the costs of this product, and it did not offer alternatives (or why it couldn't). With these points, the Tagus government could possibly save money and help its farmers and citizens in the most effective ways possible.
- As people rely more on technology to solve problems, the ability of humans to think for themselves will surely deteroriate. 83
- Scientific theories, which most people consider as "fact," almost invariably prove to be inaccurate. Thus, one should look upon any information described as "factual" with skepticism since it may be proven false in the future. 83
- The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of the Juniper Cafe, a small, local coffee shop in the downtown area of a small American city:"We must reduce overhead here at the cafe. Instead of opening at 6 a.m. weekdays, we will now open at 49
- People who make decisions based on emotion and justify those decisions with logic afterwards are poor decision makers. 54
- An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be p 42
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 512 350
No. of Characters: 2461 1500
No. of Different Words: 216 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.757 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.807 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.583 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 173 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 126 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 75 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 62 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25.6 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.234 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.7 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.343 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.551 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.087 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 320, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
... will solve the problem. However, Tagus doesnt support many of the claims it makes in ...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 27, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...nsight. Second, if the government cant confirm that X number of people out of ...
^^^^
Line 9, column 134, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...g from vitamin A deficiency, then Tagus cant determine if the subsidies will sustain...
^^^^
Line 9, column 587, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...each year, the government will subsidize to the vitamin-A millet farmers of Tagus...
^^
Line 17, column 289, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: couldn't
...it did not offer alternatives or why it couldnt. With these points, the Tagus governmen...
^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 338, Rule ID: MAY_COULD_POSSIBLY[1]
Message: Use simply 'could'.
Suggestion: could
...With these points, the Tagus government could possibly save money and help its farmers and cit...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, lastly, may, second, so, then, well, while, as to, at least, for example, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.6327345309 112% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 22.0 12.9520958084 170% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 11.1786427146 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 30.0 28.8173652695 104% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 55.5748502994 104% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2525.0 2260.96107784 112% => OK
No of words: 508.0 441.139720559 115% => OK
Chars per words: 4.97047244094 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.74751043592 4.56307096286 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.66502792288 2.78398813304 96% => OK
Unique words: 228.0 204.123752495 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.448818897638 0.468620217663 96% => OK
syllable_count: 789.3 705.55239521 112% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.8931111529 57.8364921388 69% => OK
Chars per sentence: 120.238095238 119.503703932 101% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.1904761905 23.324526521 104% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.61904761905 5.70786347227 98% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.45759926694 0.218282227539 210% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.149281347212 0.0743258471296 201% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0922086712473 0.0701772020484 131% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.278751543187 0.128457276422 217% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.100616616609 0.0628817314937 160% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.1 14.3799401198 98% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.84 12.5979740519 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.09 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 105.0 98.500998004 107% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.