An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be paid subsidies for farming the new variety of millet. Since millet is already a staple food in Tagus, people will readily adopt the new variety. To combat vitamin A deficiency, the government of Tagus should do everything it can to promote this new type of millet.
Grounding on that farmers will earn more from the new millet, and synthesizing the hypothesis that people will accept the new millet, the statement accordingly suggests that government of Tagus should promote the new breed of millet in country as an effective way to help people combat vitamin A deficiency. However, to access the efficacy of this claim, several questions want answer.
To begin with, the author assumes that farmers will choose to grow on this new type of millet due to subsidies. In order to make this supposition compelling, we need to know exactly the thoughts from the farmers. Do they want to change to grow a new type of weed, if the premise is to pay a lot to learn and buy new machines before starting? What if they already have satisfied revenue from current plants they grow that subsides have no attraction at all? A poll should be taken on the farmers to see how many of them are willing to grow this new millet.
Furthermore, even if the farmers all are willing to plant this new millet, are their farms suitable for these plants? If every farmer decide to grow this millet instead of his or her original plants, who will then grow the other essential type of plants? People of the nation will be likely to suffer from more diseases if their foods come from single one source. Likewise, the lands will become less fecund and even damage the ecological cycle that normally dominates the place.
In addition, based on that people in Tagus are already familiar with millet, the author asserts that people will accept the new type of millet without any questions or concerns. This may be true. But unless more information about the new millet is provided, we cannot justifiably verify this assumption. Does the new millet taste the same as the original one? Are there any side effects after eating this new type of millet? Since it is an impoverished country, people may also want to know if there are other substitutions of this expensive approach to get more vitamins A.
In conclusion, in order to make the claim more convincing, the author needs to answers the questions mentioned above. Otherwise, government of Tagus will face other problems once they think they have solved the problem of vitamin A deficiency.
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Comments
Essay evaluations by e-grader
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 557, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...em are willing to grow this new millet. Furthermore, even if the farmers all are...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 80, Rule ID: TO_NON_BASE[1]
Message: The verb after "to" should be in the base form: 'answer'.
Suggestion: answer
...im more convincing, the author needs to answers the questions mentioned above. Otherwis...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, also, but, furthermore, however, if, likewise, may, so, then, in addition, in conclusion, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 19.6327345309 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 32.0 28.8173652695 111% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 55.5748502994 104% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 16.3942115768 49% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1870.0 2260.96107784 83% => OK
No of words: 389.0 441.139720559 88% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.80719794344 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.44106776838 4.56307096286 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.46662350882 2.78398813304 89% => OK
Unique words: 199.0 204.123752495 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.511568123393 0.468620217663 109% => OK
syllable_count: 583.2 705.55239521 83% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.3835303353 57.8364921388 97% => OK
Chars per sentence: 98.4210526316 119.503703932 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.4736842105 23.324526521 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.10526315789 5.70786347227 107% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.419897088946 0.218282227539 192% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.13348027388 0.0743258471296 180% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0933121077037 0.0701772020484 133% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.245402499135 0.128457276422 191% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.109340097486 0.0628817314937 174% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 14.3799401198 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 48.3550499002 123% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.62 12.5979740519 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.71 8.32208582834 93% => OK
difficult_words: 76.0 98.500998004 77% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 557, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...em are willing to grow this new millet. Furthermore, even if the farmers all are...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 80, Rule ID: TO_NON_BASE[1]
Message: The verb after "to" should be in the base form: 'answer'.
Suggestion: answer
...im more convincing, the author needs to answers the questions mentioned above. Otherwis...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, also, but, furthermore, however, if, likewise, may, so, then, in addition, in conclusion, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 19.6327345309 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 32.0 28.8173652695 111% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 55.5748502994 104% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 16.3942115768 49% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1870.0 2260.96107784 83% => OK
No of words: 389.0 441.139720559 88% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.80719794344 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.44106776838 4.56307096286 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.46662350882 2.78398813304 89% => OK
Unique words: 199.0 204.123752495 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.511568123393 0.468620217663 109% => OK
syllable_count: 583.2 705.55239521 83% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.3835303353 57.8364921388 97% => OK
Chars per sentence: 98.4210526316 119.503703932 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.4736842105 23.324526521 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.10526315789 5.70786347227 107% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.419897088946 0.218282227539 192% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.13348027388 0.0743258471296 180% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0933121077037 0.0701772020484 133% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.245402499135 0.128457276422 191% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.109340097486 0.0628817314937 174% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 14.3799401198 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 48.3550499002 123% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.62 12.5979740519 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.71 8.32208582834 93% => OK
difficult_words: 76.0 98.500998004 77% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.