"The Mozart School of Music should obviously be the first choice of any music student aware of its reputation. First of all, the Mozart School stresses intensive practice and training, so that students typically begin their training at a very young age. S

Essay topics:

"The Mozart School of Music should obviously be the first choice of any music student aware of its reputation. First of all, the Mozart School stresses intensive practice and training, so that students typically begin their training at a very young age. Second, the school has ample facilities and up-to-date professional equipment, and its faculty includes some of the most distinguished music teachers in the world. Finally, many Mozart graduates have gone on to be the best known and most highly paid musicians in the nation."

The argument makes an appeal that parents should enroll their child in Mozart School of Music, along with certain reasons for the same. However, the statement can be challenged by elucidating prominent fallacies.
Firstly, the Mozart School of Music claims that it welcomes youngsters at all age levels and ability without an audition. However, what if a student enrolling is already a endowed musician and just need some expert skills for his talent? Without an audition, it might be possible that such a student is enrolled in a class full of students with average ability. This might demote his talent and hence, might result in a slow progress for that student. Therefore, lacking in conducting a proper audition before enrolling students may lead to inappropriate and biased divisions of class.
Secondly, the school claims that it offers instructions in nearly all musical genres and instruments. But, as due to the fact that too many cooks spoil the food, a student capable of playing a piano, if given training of guitar cords, might result in confusion and mismatch in his mind.
Thirdly, the faculty includes distinguished musicians; hence parents should choose Mozart School over others. This is itself a causal fallacy as; a distinguished teacher does not necessarily result in a distinguished student. Furthermore, the statement includes that the Mozart graduates have gone on to become well-known and highly paid professional musicians, but not as such data are presented regarding the ratio of such well known graduates and overall students of school. What if Mozart School gave 20 professional musicians but only out of average total 500 students? In this case, a misleading situation might occur.
To conclude, it might be possible that Mozart School of Music is a promising one, but the reasons presented in the statement in its favor might be strengthened by expounding the data related to the yearly average of students enrolled and the profession graduates, the Mozart school used to give.

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Average: 5 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 170, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
... what if a student enrolling is already a endowed musician and just need some exp...
^
Line 2, column 418, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[3]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'slow progress'.
Suggestion: slow progress
...e his talent and hence, might result in a slow progress for that student. Therefore, lacking in...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Discourse Markers used:
['but', 'first', 'firstly', 'furthermore', 'hence', 'however', 'if', 'may', 'regarding', 'second', 'secondly', 'so', 'then', 'therefore', 'third', 'thirdly', 'well']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.243767313019 0.25644967241 95% => OK
Verbs: 0.152354570637 0.15541462614 98% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0803324099723 0.0836205057962 96% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0470914127424 0.0520304965353 91% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0277008310249 0.0272364105082 102% => OK
Prepositions: 0.135734072022 0.125424944231 108% => OK
Participles: 0.0526315789474 0.0416121511921 126% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.79725309046 2.79052419416 100% => OK
Infinitives: 0.016620498615 0.026700313972 62% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.001811407834 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.1108033241 0.113004496875 98% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0304709141274 0.0255425247493 119% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.00831024930748 0.0127820249294 65% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2013.0 2731.13054187 74% => OK
No of words: 325.0 446.07635468 73% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 6.19384615385 6.12365571057 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.24591054749 4.57801047555 93% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.443076923077 0.378187486979 117% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.298461538462 0.287650121315 104% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.212307692308 0.208842608468 102% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.138461538462 0.135150697306 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79725309046 2.79052419416 100% => OK
Unique words: 181.0 207.018472906 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.556923076923 0.469332199767 119% => OK
Word variations: 59.9973861519 52.1807786196 115% => OK
How many sentences: 15.0 20.039408867 75% => OK
Sentence length: 21.6666666667 23.2022227129 93% => OK
Sentence length SD: 62.9957317778 57.7814097925 109% => OK
Chars per sentence: 134.2 141.986410481 95% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.6666666667 23.2022227129 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.13333333333 0.724660767414 156% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.14285714286 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 3.58251231527 56% => OK
Readability: 51.5128205128 51.9672348444 99% => OK
Elegance: 1.90243902439 1.8405768891 103% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.423058121535 0.441005458295 96% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.0701448578862 0.135418324435 52% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0506768271421 0.0829849096947 61% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.539220614572 0.58762219726 92% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.199753732447 0.147661913831 135% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.155807178809 0.193483328276 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.114065593757 0.0970749176394 118% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.286217356906 0.42659136922 67% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0756768895408 0.0774707102158 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.284096281441 0.312017818177 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0453562819931 0.0698173142475 65% => The ideas may be duplicated in paragraphs.

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.33743842365 96% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.87684729064 44% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.82512315271 83% => OK
Positive topic words: 7.0 6.46551724138 108% => OK
Negative topic words: 3.0 5.36822660099 56% => OK
Neutral topic words: 1.0 2.82389162562 35% => OK
Total topic words: 11.0 14.657635468 75% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.