The primary goal of technological advancement should be to increase people s efficiency so that they have more leisure time

Essay topics:

The primary goal of technological advancement should be to increase people's efficiency so that they have more leisure time.

Since the technological boom has taken place since the beginning of this century, the calculating ability of a single computer chip is hundreds, even thousands, times more powerful than one produced ten years earlier. In addition to sheer strength, users experience has also plucked up since it is a important criteria to the customers when purchasing software. The prompt suggests that people's thinking ability will decline as technology flourishes. In my opinion, I mostly disagree with this suggestion and argues that people's ability to think will be robust, if not improve, as the result of the technological advancements for two reasons.

Although technologies bring convenience more than one can imagine, and some argue that laziness drives human innovations, there is no way it is making us a less intelligent species. It is common that students use their calculators in classes and examinations instead of listing lines of equations in their notes, which admittedly lowers their ability to calculate by heart. However, this practice also releases the students from getting stucked in petty details and encourages them to have a firmer grasp on the big picture, or the general idea that the teacher is conveying, which is of a much higher priority. The above example illustrates that the usage of technologies in life is highly contingent how people weigh in the pros and cons, and it will usually be more beneficial than harmful.

Further, the technology is merely a tool for us to acquire higher level knowledge and intelligence. As the field of AI (Artificial Intelligence) is becoming the alleged future of the whole field of information technology. It should be taken into account that the amount of time, efforts and brilliant ideas of hundreds and thousands of the most intelligent individuals in the world to acquire that goal. So this pursuit for having the computer to imitate how human think and acts is actually urging people to ponder deeper and in much more complicated ways than ever before. It is common that a birth of a state of the art technology advancement that will benefit the whole world requires throng of people to contribute their ideas to construct and polish it. The value of the amount of thinking it inspires will surely surpass that of the amount of repetitive work it relieves people from doing requires. Moreover, looking back at all the steps we took to improve our science and technology, we can be certain of one reality. The history tells us that we will keep making something new and not be satisfied by our current situation, which all the more certainly will entail an increased intelligence or accumulation of knowledge on what we already have.

Technology, defined by its commercial traits, will keep on its endeavor of helping people get rid of mindless repetitions in everyday life, attracting more and more to rely on it. However, by providing human with more opportunities to pursue that endeavor, it will certainly not erode our ability to think for ourselves.

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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 299, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...erience has also plucked up since it is a important criteria to the customers whe...
^
Line 1, column 311, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'criterion'?
Suggestion: criterion
...also plucked up since it is a important criteria to the customers when purchasing softwa...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 101, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...igher level knowledge and intelligence. As the field of AI Artificial Intelligence...
^^
Line 5, column 605, Rule ID: STATE_OF_THE_ART[1]
Message: Did you mean 'state-of-the-art'?
Suggestion: state-of-the-art
... before. It is common that a birth of a state of the art technology advancement that will benefi...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, however, if, look, moreover, so, as to, in addition, in my opinion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.5258426966 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.4196629213 97% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 14.8657303371 114% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 11.3162921348 150% => OK
Pronoun: 48.0 33.0505617978 145% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 68.0 58.6224719101 116% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 12.9106741573 93% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2527.0 2235.4752809 113% => OK
No of words: 498.0 442.535393258 113% => OK
Chars per words: 5.07429718876 5.05705443957 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.72397222731 4.55969084622 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.84327493419 2.79657885939 102% => OK
Unique words: 268.0 215.323595506 124% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.538152610442 0.4932671777 109% => OK
syllable_count: 802.8 704.065955056 114% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 6.24550561798 112% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.99550561798 120% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.10617977528 161% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.77640449438 169% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.38483146067 91% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.2370786517 89% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 23.0359550562 117% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.0552548478 60.3974514979 68% => OK
Chars per sentence: 140.388888889 118.986275619 118% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.6666666667 23.4991977007 118% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.83333333333 5.21951772744 93% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 10.2758426966 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 5.13820224719 39% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.83258426966 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.230759566304 0.243740707755 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0665962352587 0.0831039109588 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0466683786445 0.0758088955206 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.130036791416 0.150359130593 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0484862476198 0.0667264976115 73% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.3 14.1392134831 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.07 48.8420337079 90% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.1743820225 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.42 12.1639044944 102% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.26 8.38706741573 110% => OK
difficult_words: 135.0 100.480337079 134% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 11.8971910112 122% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.2143820225 114% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.7820224719 110% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.


Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.