Raising family in some countries has been a responsibility of a mother whilst father takes a part as chief of family. Therefore, in marriage life, women tend to spend her whole life in taking care children and husband. Nevertheless, after the modernization in various parts, women try to earn money by her own effort and become settle by herself.
There are two points of view in raising family. First of all, a moderate mindset that woman should stay at home after marriage and let her husband works as hard as possible to fulfill their needs. Furthermore, after having a baby, the responsibility of mother is not only to her husband but also manage the children well with enough affection and care. In Indonesia for instance, women supposed to be a house wife eventhough in her previous life, she was a worker. Secondly, a mindset that being a mother doesn't mean a woman must release her career as a worker. Even, a housewife should have their own income to support the family. It occurs in some cities in the world wide. As the result it encourages an opinion that a government should support the housewives financially in order to help them in taking care the family.
On this point, I stand on second point of view. I believe that being a mother is a precious matter for women. So the government should discharge a lot of fund to support them. In some countries, there is a fact that the needs of a complete family requires a high budget that doesn't covered by single-income. That is why, several wives try to work to help her husband to fulfill their basic needs. As the consequence, sometimes a mother has less time for her child and family and it affects their life in the future.
The government should be aware of how important to help the mothers in raising family. Within the support of the government, it will help the family to be better financially. Overall, the assistance of the government will guarantee the welfare of a family.
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and become settle by herself.
and become settled by herself.
the responsibility of mother is not only to her husband but also manage the children well with enough affection and care.
Description: Not only...but also is not used properly. can you re-write this sentence?
women supposed to be a house wife eventhough in her previous life, she was a worker.
women are supposed to be a house wife even though in her previous life, she was a worker.
a high budget that doesn't covered by single-income.
a high budget that isn't covered by single-income.
Sentence: In Indonesia for instance, women supposed to be a house wife eventhough in her previous life, she was a worker.
Error: eventhough Suggestion: No alternate word
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 346 350
No. of Characters: 1563 1500
No. of Different Words: 172 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.313 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.517 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.576 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 111 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 67 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 41 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 28 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.3 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.649 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.4 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.306 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.471 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.157 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5