Some suggest that young people should take a job for a few years between school and university Discuss what the advantages and disadvantages might be for people who do this Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowl

Every student who has a gap year before going to university is often advised to apply for a job. They believe that by doing that, they can be mature as well as feeling sympathy to their parents'financial pressure. However, their mental health may be attacked leading to making an impact on physical health due to the huge amount of work.
Teenagers will learn the maturity through their first trial working time at a small business during their gap year. As the money that they earn depends on how responsible they are to their job. Because of that, they have to try their best to finish every task as carefully as possible. Even though they are scolded by their boss or they make the manager frustrated, they put their pride away to consume those critical comments. It is only for the money and their patience to be successful at their field in the future. Then they can truly realize that no matter how prideful they are, the money significantly matters. Besides, they see how hard their parents have worked to provide them the best life which never has a lack of amenities. That's the moment they gradually taste the harsh life and from here, their mindset starts to shift. For example, a boy is rich and he has never worked before so he only know how heavy the pressure of life is until he is doing something for a living on his own following with appreciating the money he makes more and more.
On the other hand, youngsters can't avoid feeling stressed for the reason that they have to deal with loads of work at the same time. As a teen having not graduated yet, they can just be accepted to work as a servant at a restaurant or a cafe shop. In fact, those jobs require them to do multiple things which sometimes they can be confused about what to do. They are a novice so they are inevitable to make some silly mistakes and get told off. That's the reason why they may criticize themselves for not paying enough attention or they seem to overthink everything that happened and make up a whole tragedy. Those negative reactions might result in skipping meals or staying up too late to improve their skills. In fact, these are the most common indicators of a chaotic brain working so hard. it is proved by the acne on some young people'face or how tiring their eyes may look like when we come across them at a shopping mall.
In conclusion, it feels like signing a contract when students decide to spend the gap year working instead of going to university immediately. Undoubtedly, it is beneficial for them to change their immature way of thinking but in order to endure that, they must go through continuous stressful situations at work. Anyways, they can achieve something at least from a short period of working as a preparation for struggling to be independent financially.

Votes
Average: 5.6 (1 vote)
Essays by the user:

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 116, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...a small business during their gap year. As the money that they earn depends on how...
^^
Line 2, column 738, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: That's
...fe which never has a lack of amenities. Thats the moment they gradually taste the har...
^^^^^
Line 2, column 906, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[3]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'knows'.
Suggestion: knows
...d he has never worked before so he only know how heavy the pressure of life is until...
^^^^
Line 3, column 31, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...nd more. On the other hand, youngsters cant avoid feeling stressed for the reason t...
^^^^
Line 3, column 445, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: That's
...e some silly mistakes and get told off. Thats the reason why they may criticize thems...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 794, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...ors of a chaotic brain working so hard. it is proved by the acne on some young peo...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
anyway, besides, but, first, however, if, look, may, so, then, well, at least, for example, in conclusion, in fact, as well as, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 13.1623246493 144% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 7.85571142285 140% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 10.4138276553 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 7.30460921844 178% => OK
Pronoun: 63.0 24.0651302605 262% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 71.0 41.998997996 169% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.3376753507 36% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2286.0 1615.20841683 142% => OK
No of words: 497.0 315.596192385 157% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.59959758551 5.12529762239 90% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.72159896747 4.20363070211 112% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.48068703404 2.80592935109 88% => OK
Unique words: 270.0 176.041082164 153% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.543259557344 0.561755894193 97% => OK
syllable_count: 709.2 506.74238477 140% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.60771543086 87% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 18.0 5.43587174349 331% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.10420841683 190% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.76152304609 105% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 16.0721442886 143% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.2975951904 103% => OK
Sentence length SD: 32.5325487732 49.4020404114 66% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.3913043478 106.682146367 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.6086956522 20.7667163134 104% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.30434782609 7.06120827912 89% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.01903807615 120% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.67935871743 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 3.9879759519 251% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.119824608541 0.244688304435 49% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0432714323743 0.084324248473 51% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0428299915788 0.0667982634062 64% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0953642233968 0.151304729494 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0207986812883 0.056905535591 37% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 13.0946893788 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 67.08 50.2224549098 134% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 11.3001002004 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.4 12.4159519038 76% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.7 8.58950901804 90% => OK
difficult_words: 95.0 78.4519038076 121% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 9.78957915832 82% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.1190380762 103% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.7795591182 74% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.