People are becoming too dependent on the internet and phone Is it a positive or negative development

Essay topics:

People are becoming too dependent on the internet and phone.Is it a positive or negative development?

Recent years, there is a wide spread phenomenon that general population are overly relying on electronic devices. I strongly believe its drawbacks outweigh the benefits.

On the one hand,there are multiple reasons why I think the fact that the general public indulges in modern communications will generate harmful impacts to them. Firstly, many individuals have already were accustomed of using telecommunications which lead them to adopt a sedentary life style. This kind of living pattern will have a detrimental effect to them both mentally and physically. For example, it was reported in china, more than 70 percent of younger generations choose to surf the internet at home after work, and this trend has kept growing. Some of them were diagnosed with severe depression because of this trend.
Secondly, people who have low self-control might become addictive with these technologies which could prevent them from focusing on their works and studies. Videos and games on the internet and smartphones are always designed with intriguing contents, tempting people to spend vast amount of hours on them. As a result, students and working classes might be distracted by them from their social obligations

On the other hand, the commonly adoption of internet and telephone certainly brought much conveniences to our societies. With their help,People no longer need to spend their time on commuting when they try to send a message to someone far away. These equipment could boosting working classes’ efficiency dramatically. For example, when a chief executive officer is travelling oversea, he can check and respond his email on his laptop using internet whenever and wherever he want without worrying about postpone his working schedule.

In conclusion, even though it seems sensible for general citizens to adopt the modern technologies, I think they still should limit their frequencies of using them.

Votes
Average: 1.1 (1 vote)
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Essays by user guojunliang :

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 16, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , there
...utweigh the benefits. On the one hand,there are multiple reasons why I think the fa...
^^^^^^
Line 4, column 74, Rule ID: GENERAL_XX[1]
Message: Use simply 'public'.
Suggestion: public
...e reasons why I think the fact that the general public indulges in modern communications will ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 201, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'been'.
Suggestion: been
... Firstly, many individuals have already were accustomed of using telecommunications ...
^^^^
Line 7, column 86, Rule ID: MUCH_COUNTABLE[1]
Message: Use 'many' with countable nouns.
Suggestion: many
...nternet and telephone certainly brought much conveniences to our societies. With the...
^^^^
Line 7, column 137, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , People
...iences to our societies. With their help,People no longer need to spend their time on c...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 246, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this equipment' or 'These equipments'?
Suggestion: This equipment; These equipments
... to send a message to someone far away. These equipment could boosting working classes’ efficie...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 268, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: 'boost'
Suggestion: boost
...someone far away. These equipment could boosting working classes’ efficiency dramaticall...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 475, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'wants'.
Suggestion: wants
...using internet whenever and wherever he want without worrying about postpone his wor...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, if, second, secondly, so, still, for example, i think, in conclusion, kind of, as a result, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 13.1623246493 68% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 7.85571142285 115% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 10.4138276553 86% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 7.30460921844 96% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 24.0651302605 141% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 40.0 41.998997996 95% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.3376753507 36% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1622.0 1615.20841683 100% => OK
No of words: 299.0 315.596192385 95% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.42474916388 5.12529762239 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.1583189471 4.20363070211 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.85185654612 2.80592935109 102% => OK
Unique words: 200.0 176.041082164 114% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.66889632107 0.561755894193 119% => OK
syllable_count: 490.5 506.74238477 97% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 5.43587174349 110% => OK
Article: 1.0 2.52805611222 40% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 16.0721442886 87% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.2975951904 103% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.5510461435 49.4020404114 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.857142857 106.682146367 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.3571428571 20.7667163134 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.92857142857 7.06120827912 126% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.01903807615 159% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.67935871743 81% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 3.4128256513 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0717152465181 0.244688304435 29% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0221883545593 0.084324248473 26% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.030113952049 0.0667982634062 45% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0335783345408 0.151304729494 22% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0362336105516 0.056905535591 64% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.8 13.0946893788 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 50.2224549098 100% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.3001002004 102% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.16 12.4159519038 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.64 8.58950901804 112% => OK
difficult_words: 94.0 78.4519038076 120% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 9.78957915832 92% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.1190380762 103% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.7795591182 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.

Rates: 11.2359550562 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.