Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Young people today have no influence on the important decisions that determine the future of society as a whole. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
In the modern era, young people have a great role in decision making in the societies. It is essential that young people with high potential to be as a leader of works. In progressive countries they are using young people energies at the sensative management. Althogh, some people believe young people today have no influance on the important decisions that determine the future of societyas a whole, In my opinion it is not authentic claim. In next paragraph I will elaborate two reasons for my idea.
The first exquisite reason to be mentioned is role of Information Technology. Information Technology has became progress in last decades and it has undeniable effect on society. IT not only has promoted and has envolved all aspects of the societies but also has became inseparable part of nowadays life. IT is a young knowledge and need young people with high level of information; hence, many parts of societies established with IT programs. They have employed young people for their digital works. Programing, developing social networks, online shops, etc. are only minor part of sections that have embodied young people in body of their works. My own exprience is a complete parable in this case; when I was a college student acompained by other classmates were working a commercial centre and we deveople their networks and control their financial’s sector. In this work our group was so young, average of our ages was only 22 years old. We were controler and developer of a huge mall. Don’t think you it is a exaggerate claim, It was a young student collaborate in a part of social sector.
Second reason is the management of risks. In management levels, manager need a high flexibelity and accomodately with the various conditions. It is neccessary that a manager to be a riskable to improve their company. Many of investor is trying to select a young manager, thay tell: if a company having a young manager, He could influnce on all part of his subsectors and could accelerate the profitabelity of their companies. Therefore, In pioneer countries young manager has became a paradigm. The new studies of London Financial Management Institute depicted that more than 75 percent of commercial companies with manager under 35 years old are in the list of 100 top England companian. Final result of this study showed that this companies made a high risks and attracted many of client with vast advertisements. Consequently, derived form this study that young manager have a clear trace on the society. It promiss a grater vestage on the society in future.
In short, based on ofermentioned resons. Even thogh some people assume young people don’t have any improtant influnce on the societies decision making, In my view, young people is the core of sensative decisions ownig to, in one hand obligation of ITs progress brings young people on the manageent levels, and management of risk need the young people with riskable spirite on the other hand. These reasons assure me that the role of young people in the future will support.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2020-01-19 | mohammad9090 | 90 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 107, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'become'.
Suggestion: become
...Technology. Information Technology has became progress in last decades and it has und...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 183, Rule ID: PRP_RB_NO_VB[1]
Message: Are you missing a verb?
...it has undeniable effect on society. IT not only has promoted and has envolved all a...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 265, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'become'.
Suggestion: become
...l aspects of the societies but also has became inseparable part of nowadays life. IT ...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1033, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...a huge mall. Don't think you it is a exaggerate claim, It was a young stude...
^
Line 3, column 1033, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...a huge mall. Don't think you it is a exaggerate claim, It was a young student collabor...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 649, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ompanies with manager under 35 years old are in the list of 100 top England com...
^^
Line 5, column 964, Rule ID: IN_PAST[1]
Message: Did you mean: 'in the future'?
Suggestion: in the future
...romiss a grater vestage on the society in future. In short, based on ofermentioned r...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, hence, if, second, so, then, therefore, in short, in my opinion, in my view
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 15.1003584229 146% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 47.0 43.0788530466 109% => OK
Preposition: 69.0 52.1666666667 132% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2655.0 1977.66487455 134% => OK
No of words: 514.0 407.700716846 126% => OK
Chars per words: 5.16536964981 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.76146701107 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.97219026514 2.67179642975 111% => OK
Unique words: 270.0 212.727598566 127% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.525291828794 0.524837075471 100% => OK
syllable_count: 811.8 618.680645161 131% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 10.0 4.94265232975 202% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 20.6003584229 136% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 69.9197061358 48.9658058833 143% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.8214285714 100.406767564 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.3571428571 20.6045352989 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.82142857143 5.45110844103 70% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 15.0 4.88709677419 307% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.262682684676 0.236089414692 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0693032668032 0.076458572812 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0729280498037 0.0737576698707 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.185896249872 0.150856017488 123% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0886239721486 0.0645574589148 137% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.1 11.7677419355 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 58.1214874552 92% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.71 10.9000537634 117% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.83 8.01818996416 110% => OK
difficult_words: 140.0 86.8835125448 161% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.